Sun Warrior of Primus: Always Be there
by RazormusPrime
Summary: Sides has always felt he was not big in his twin's life. Sunny has had nightmares since the accident, of death and pain and he doesn't know how to stop them or how to keep Sides safe until he gets the chance to change it all with one decision with Primus
1. Prologue: Big in my life

Sparkling - Newborn

Youngling - Child

_Italics_ – Thoughts

Breem - 8.3 Earth minutes

Joor - About 6.5 Earth hours

Orn - About 13 Earth days

Vorn - About 83 Earth years

-Comm. Link-

_-Private Comm. link-_

* * *

><p>"<em>Remember bro, no matter what happens I'll always come back…"<em>

_When his brother had first told him that he had taken it for granted…Now he just wished he had paid more attention…_

…

"Sunstreaker! What are you doing?" Sideswipe called to him in shock as his brother step into the line of shot meant for him, with his arms spread out in a protective stance but he was facing towards him.

What the frag was he doing? He wasn't even responding to his call through their bond! Why was he just standing there ignoring him?

He needed to get out of the way! If he gets blasted…

Suddenly with all the strength he had left in his body, Sideswipe began to beg and plead to the transformer god himself to get his brother to move but he wouldn't budge…Even with the charge of the cannon getting louder.

"Primus, Sunstreaker! MOVE!" Sideswipe begged, energon tears streaming down his faceplates as he tried desperately to get up to get to his brother. Even with his damaged legs, his left leg battered almost beyond recognition, only dangling on by a mangled piece of metal.

"I'm sorry Sides; it's supposed to be this way…" Sunstreaker whispered softly, his faceplates baring the most pained and spark broken smile.

Then the trigger was pulled.

The deafening crack of the accursed blaster echoed across the battle field as the golden mech faceplates contorted into utter shock and pain as a large hole appeared over his spark chamber, revealing his spark beating rapidly with in his chest. Sideswipe stared in shock at the wound over his brother's chest. It had torn through and evaporated the armor of his back to his chest but left his spark intact…but what horrified Sideswipe the most was that the edges of the damaged, burned armor was beginning to evaporate into golden flashes, not of rust but into golden dust.

_No…this this can't be happening! He can't be dying!_

Time seemed to slow down for Sideswipe as he stared at his brother as a pain shot through his frame, most of it emanating from his chest plates.

Their bond beginning to server but Sideswipe could still feel his brother's pain but even so he knew he couldn't feel the extent of the pain. Sunstreaker was blocking most of it from him.

"NO!" Sideswipe wasn't even sure if it was him who screamed. He was in too much of a shock to notice.

Every Autobot and Decepticon snapped their attention towards the two at hearing the pain stricken scream. They watched in utter shock as the golden mech legs buckled and began to topple to the ground, his ghost of a smile never faltering.

Suddenly a new strength surged through Sideswipe's body as he lunged forward, completely ignoring the pain in his leg. All that mattered was him getting to his brother.

Sideswipe was surprised he even had the strength or energy to catch his brother and remain on his pedes but he hardly paid mind to that.

"Sideswipe! Get away from him! You don't know if it can affect you!" someone warned him, he thought it was Ratchet or maybe Wheeljack about the effects of the weapon but it didn't matter. It's not like it was cosmic rust, he's seen what this stuff can do to a bot but it wasn't contagious. Either way, even if it was he still needed to be with his brother.

"_Sides…?"_ Sunstreaker whispered softly both out loud and through their bond, his voice trembling and by the pain he himself felt he knew his brother was in even worse pain.

"_What?"_ Sideswipe snapped, clenching his brother in his arms, he didn't mean to snap at him but he was just angry. Why the frag didn't he move? Why the frag did he have to be a good brother and save him? And why in Pit did he have to die?

Why…why was Primus so cruel? Taking away the only family he had left? If Sunny dies then he'll be all alone…

He didn't want to be left alone…

"_I-I'm sorry Sides…it was just supposed…to be…this way…"_ Sunstreaker muttered softly as he weakly wrapped his arms around his brother. Shuddering weakly as his wound was pressed against his brother's silver frame.

"_I had to do it…It has to be this way…If…not…it would've…been you…"_ Sunstreaker muttered softly.

"_What are…you talking about? You…You knew?"_ Sideswipe growled angrily, clenching onto his brother tighter through tried his best not to hurt him.

"_I've known…for so long…I…couldn't tell anyone…not even you…all those nightmares…They wouldn't s-stop…" _Sunstreaker shuddered as he clenched his dentals in pain._ "Then…I had this o-one…except now it's r-real…I…was so… scared…but now…everything's going…to be alright…" _Sunstreaker chuckled weakly as he began to rub the back of Sideswipe's silver helm.

"_What are you talking about? Nothing's alright! You're dying and there's nothing any fragging bot can do to stop that!" _Sideswipe growled darkly his body beginning to tremble trying to hold back the tears.

It was true.

Nothing could stop the effects and damage done to Sunstreaker…The weapon was so new and so destructive a cure had not been made yet…

"_N-No…Sides…You're w-wrong…the…n-nightmare…it…wasn't…m-me…I-I was….worried about…" _Sunstreaker shuttered weakly.

"_Then what are you fragging talking about?" _Sideswipe hissed as he pulled his brother away from him for a moment to look him in the optic. Identical ice blue optics gazes down at ones gazing through dying eyes.

"_T-This…It w-wasn't me…dying…right now…" _Sunstreaker started explained, through when he said 'dying' it sounded as if he had already accepted his fate so long ago. _"It…wasn't…me…it was…always you…I…couldn't let that…happen…Sides…"_

Sideswipe optics widen as he felt his spark turn cold. He was supposed to die…Not Sunny…He protected him from his fate with his own…So many things went through his processor at that moment but he really only had one thing to say.

"_Why?" _Sideswipe growled yanking his brother back in his arms as energon tears began to flow freely from his optics, blurring his vision. Sunstreaker let out a soft gasp in pain at the sudden movement but didn't make a sound otherwise.

Through Sideswipe's teary optics he was only a golden haze.

"_You said you hated me! You wished I was never sparked! Why? Why would you save me? Why?" _Sideswipe screamed but suddenly stopped talking as Sunstreaker pulled back started to wipe away his tears.

Suddenly a series of whistles and hums tore through the battle field, surprising several of the bots as well as the cons there. The gently humming was soothing and calm, almost something you would sing to a sparkling to get them to recharge.

Sunstreaker…He was singing, his voice was smooth and harmonious, oddly gentle for a warrior but still gentle, almost hypnotic in a way. Though his singing seemed to be more of humming since he used no words but it was a familiar song to the golden and silver twins.

'_What…What are you d-doing?'_ Sideswipe sobbed through their bond, unsure he'd be able to speak, recognizing the tune his brother was humming. Sunstreaker merely shushed him off before closing his optics and continued to gently hum the melody through a series of whistles and clicks.

_I can't wait to come around to raise the stakes…_

_I truly love a fight that's won before it's started; so much fun._

_I can't stay in case I read your inner page._

_Don't tell me I'm a right that's wrong_

This…This wasn't fair…Just when Sunstreaker had decided to be caring he had to do this to himself and now he was going to leave him…

"_Sides…I…wouldn't be…doing this if I wasn't protecting something important to me…" _Sunstreaker's whispered weakly to Sideswipe through only their bond as he sang. _'I-I've…always…care for…you S-Sideswipe…Just hard…s-sometimes…to s-show it…'_

_'Cause you're not big in my life_

_Not big in my life_

_Not big in my life at all_

_And I'm not big in your life_

_Not big in your life_

_Not big in your life at all…_

New energon tears began to form in his optics but he did little to fight them back this time. Letting them flow freely as his wrapped his arms tighter around his golden brother's chassis. The tips of his silver servo's could feel the mangled bent metal edges of the gaping hole on his brother's back, causing him to shutter softly.

"_You know…it was…never…true…What…I…said…All those…years ago..." _Sunstreaker whispered weakly through their bond as he continued to sing, opening his optics to gaze up at the stars above.

"_I don't hate you…and I…d-don't…wish…that you…were never s-sparked…I was j-just so s-scared…and c-confused of what…was happening…W-What I…could see…and not…knowing…how to…s-stop it…I…was s-so scared…but now…it's alright…I…just wish I…didn't have to leave…you…I-" _Suddenly Sunstreaker gasped, getting cut off as pain surged through his body. His singing by then had stopped completely as his body turned rigid. His optics widening as pain shot through his body before he began to cough up energon.

And everyone knew, it took no genius to know what was going on…

Sunstreaker was running out of time…

These were his final moments…

It was the end…

"_No! You can't leave me!"_ Sideswipe cried through their fading bond as he clenched into his brother's tense form, feeling the heat of his brother's exposed spark slowly beginning to fade as his armor started to turn ash grey.

Their bond…It was starting to grow so weak and server it was like someone was tearing and cutting out his spark with a dull energon blade except worse…Much worse…

"_What am I going to do without you? Primus, Sunstreaker I need you!" _Sideswipe sobbed, not sure whether he had said it out loud through their bond or a loud or both. He didn't care either way…

The golden mech in his arms, his reflection not only in appearance but mirrored in personality simply smiled weakly at him before muttering his final words both through their bond and loud enough for the others to hear.

"_I-I'm s-so…sorry…S-Sides…Love you…Has…to be…this w-way…Remember…my…promise…"_

And suddenly like that, he was gone. A shower of golden dust, brushing gently against Sideswipe's energon stained and mutilated armor as the wind picked up. While the rest of the dust simply flew off in the wind until it was gone.

_No matter what happens I'll always come back…_

Sideswipe gazed up at the stars above, his optics out of focused until he clenched his fists and let out a howling pain stricken roar of lost and pure agony. In the process of his cry he had unsheathed his blades, the blades Sunstreaker had given him for their creation day before they came out here today…Before he had come out to give his life for his…

It didn't matter that he was surrounded by dozens of mechs and femmes, about half of them he knew but now more than ever had he felt…no, _was_ utterly and completely alone…

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I'm cruel, I killed Sunstreaker off on his and Sideswipe creation day :'( I AM SO CRUEL! DX Oh yeah and keep in mind Sunstreaker and Sideswipe are pretty young in this fanfic. They're like young teens. This story takes place really early on, like the bots haven't even gone to earth yet :p and again I'M SO CRUEL! DX

Anywhoo! Don't ask me how Sunstreaker died, just go with what you interpret and carry on 030

Wow, if you guys aren't crying I must assume you're either heartless souls or may be wonder what the freak happened to lead to this FD Well have no fear! This is pretty much a prologue gonna rewind and take a step back to explain ;)

The tune Sunstreaker was singing/humming to and those lyrics are "Not that Big" by Imogen Heap and Tempo Shark and if I'm generous I'll give you guys a link to my fav vid with this song playing FD and put it on the top of my profile. ;) Why make Sunstreaker sing/hum this song? Cuz it reminds me of them in a way :D Well sorta :p not right now but how Sunstreaker just felt once way earlier in the fanfic and again THIS IS NOT A SLASH.

That is all 030

Peace! Please review! XD


	2. Sight through dying eyes

**A/N: **Chapter 2, takes place 9 transformer years earlier 030 Hope you like it! Enjoy ;D

Sparkling - Newborn

Youngling - Child

_Italics_ – Thoughts

Breem - 8.3 Earth minutes

Joor - About 6.5 Earth hours

Orn - About 13 Earth days

Vorn - About 83 Earth years

-Comm. Link-

_-Private Comm. link-_

* * *

><p><strong>9 Vorns ago <strong>

"AHHHHH!" Sunstreaker jolted awake in one swift moment as a horrified shriek escaped his voice capacitor destroying any bits of silence within the base. He quickly went into a fetal position as the horrific images flashed across his optics and gripped his helm, trying to get the screams to stop.

It was happening again…

Even when he was finally awake the nightmares that voice still haunted him.

He thought they would stop after having all those tests done to his processor but they just wouldn't leave…

They just never stopped…They were so real...

He just couldn't stop screaming. He couldn't escape this darkness…He just wanted to wake up…

Suddenly a wave a terror swept past Sunstreaker.

_Sideswipe?_ He couldn't open his optics or stop screaming. Where was he?

A quick wave a panic tore through Sunstreaker's small frame as he tried so desperately to open his optics to see where his brother was. He had given up shortly as soon he felt the usually wave of fear and attempts of comfort pull at the edges of his spark.

Sideswipe…He knew exactly where he was exactly where he always went when this happened...

He was sitting on the floor at the far side of the room, cowering by the door. His optics closed as he covered his audio receptors in an attempt to drown out his brother's screams.

_Coward…_ Sunstreaker thought bitterly, these dreams had turned him colder from the day he started having them up to the point where he cared little for his brother. Why was he even wondering where he was in the first place? He was always there and just won't leave…

The small silver youngling just sat there, scared out of his processor for his brother, just waiting for help to arrive.

To both their luck a yellow and red mech quickly bolted into the room followed by a slightly smaller red and white mech who quickly picked up Sideswipe. Meanwhile the yellow and red mech with ancient, stern yet gentle pale blue optics picked up the screaming golden youngling. Before the golden mech could break free from his grip he quickly held him against his chest plates, close to his spark like how he did when Sunstreaker had been a sparkling and calmly started to comfort the shrieking youngling, already having gone through this several times before.

"It's alright Sunstreaker…I'm here you don't have to worry…I'm here…" The yellow and red mech cooed softly while rubbing the helm of the shaking and frightened youngling. The mech continued to do so until Sunstreaker's screams eventually subsided into sobs but at least it was better than screaming.

"Ratchet?" The red and white mech holding Sideswipe called to the yellow and red mech.

"Yes, First Aid?" the yellow and red mech now designated Ratchet asked tiredly, stopping momentarily from comforting the small youngling who's sobs had finally resided to soft clicking and whimpers as he gazed down at his apprentice.

"I thought…After all that we had done for Sunstreaker that we had finally been able to stop these outbursts…" First Aid muttered in disappointment.

"I fear these are not just normal outbursts First Aid…I hardly even think they're outbursts to begin with…" Ratchet said solemnly as he started to make his way towards the door with the still trembling youngling in his arms. "If you don't know then sir, how are we supposed to help Sunstreaker?" First Aid asked timidly as Ratchet stopped and turned towards him. First Aid took a moment to gaze down at the trembling youngling with pained optics.

Nothing so young and so innocent should be going through something like this…It just wasn't fair.

"That's what I plan to find out, First Aid" He said before exiting the door.

"Bring Sideswipe." Ratchet called from outside though it was more like an ordered as First Aid listened as his heavy footfalls walk off. After a few moments First Aid quickly followed in suit as the door shut behind him, struggling to catch up to the taller mech's long strides.

* * *

><p>Ratchet and First Aid, they were talking about him again along with Arcee (she's in the science division, gotta count for something) and some copper rose femme he didn't know. Meanwhile he lying down on a berth not too far off with Sideswipe sitting on the opposite end him trying to keep his distance. The silver youngling looked scared and confused on what was happening to his brother; well at least that's what Sunstreaker could sense through their bond.<p>

He couldn't care less…He was just trapped in his own little world, staring out into space…trying to figure out his current dream that had ended up waking up half the base…

_Dream…_

* * *

><p><em>Explosions blasted at me in every direction, threatening to shatter my audio receptors and pretty much every other part of my frame. All around me I see partly destroyed buildings as I drive past each block, the devastation getting worse and worse the closer I get to wherever I'm heading to.<em>

_Where am I heading to anyway? This place this world I am can't be Cybertron but before I can think much more of where I am I transform. I say something to the tank I can't understand before tackling him even though he's twice my size, well my size as the mech I'm seeing life through. _

_This was so strange; I've never had a dream like this, seeing through the life of a warrior. Why was I, or this mech attacking his own and why was the other mech fighting back? Well then again I was attacking him so that was reason enough. As I fight I knock off his weapons before something comes to mind._

_When I had spoken to the mech a word stood out, I wasn't sure what it was. 'Decepticon'_

_What is a decepticon? What language is this? How can I understand it? Where am I? What's going on? I had no answers to my questions but I knew one thing and one thing for sure. Something inside me, some sort of instinct or spirit told me I needed to stop this mech from causing any more damage._

_Suddenly I felt the mech reach back and grab my arm and thrust me forward. The next thing I knew I'm in the air, thrown across into some sort of building made of very weak building material considering the material crumbles on impact. I hear terrified screams all around me but they sound different. I'm not sure what it is its just different._

_This is insane, this has never happened before, nothing made sense._

_Suddenly a small flash catches my attention as I gaze down at the shattered glass around me. In the glass I had crashed into when I was thrown I see a thousand reflections of myself but of course it isn't me I see._

_The mech staring back at me was completely silver, like Sideswipe and had these long thin horn like things on the sides of his helm. He looked familiar but I couldn't put a name on the face. I can never remember the name of the face until it's too late anyway…_

_In the reflection I can see a blue optic past his cracked visor. Blue optics? That's strange, most bots with blue optics are calmer and more peaceful. They rarely get involve in battles or anything that has to do with the military. What was even stranger it appeared his mech was rather small. So a small blue opticed mech fighting a war machine. I can't say I don't fine that the least bit strange. Why would someone like him be fighting? They aren't at war…Or maybe…they will… _

_No, I can't make myself think like that! My dreams never warn me of stuff like that…_

_Suddenly a towering shadow loomed over me and just as I turned to try to catch a glimpse of who it was I'm in the air again, this time flying higher and past buildings. Everything is going on so fast for a moment I hardly even knew what was going on until by body hit the surface, the top of some sort of tower, the force of being thrown down caused it to ring slightly. _

_My first instinct is to get out of the mech's grip, the one who has me trapped on the tower. _

_He's saying something to me or the mech I am in the dream but I can't hear him I could only see his blood red gaze with a lust for spilt energon. The mech's voice, it's so harsh and cold it scares me…I…I've heard it before…but from where? _

_I scream something up at him as I try to shoot him but I can't understand what I'm saying. Suddenly a sharp processor splitting pain emanates from my midsection. I feel like screaming but nothing comes out I'm already too far gone but I can still see and hear what's going on. The silver mech gloating at him, holding me in both arms speaking again in the strange language again before throwing my lifeless frame aside like I was nothing but scrap metal…Then again now I was. Suddenly my memories shift to all the pained most devastating memories in the mech's life from the start to his end and I scream._

* * *

><p><em>…End of Dream<em>

And then he had woken up screaming…feeling the pain of the mech he had seen his final moments of…

"Sunstreaker?" Sideswipe muttered softly, trying to get his brother's attention.

Sunstreaker growled softly as he opened his optics. "_What?_" He asked, harsher than he intended but he already said it so not much he could do about that.

"What was your dream…er nightmare?" Sideswipe asked hesitantly but curious none the less.

"Nothing that you need to know about." Sunstreaker replied emotionless as he gazed off into space, closing his optics slightly.

"But maybe I can help?" Sideswipe replied hopefully.

"I don't want to talk about it, Sideswipe and I don't want your help…" was all Sunstreaker responded before turning away from his brother, closing his optics tiredly.

He was so tried…So tired…and so scared…he couldn't fall asleep…he couldn't see those nightmares anymore…He just couldn't…Why? Why was this happening to him…?

Why couldn't Ratchet and Wheeljack invent some sort of cure for whatever was happening to him?

"How is he?" a surprisingly awake baritone voice asked. The concern in his voice caught Sunstreaker's attention causing him to crack open an optic and turn back to gaze at the newly arrived mechs. Both were silver but one of them had his back turned to him, the other he recognized immediately.

Optimus? What was he doing here?

"For right now we assume, sir" replied Ratchet to the silver and blue/red mech, taking a glance towards Sunstreaker and Sideswipe before stepping out to the next room.

Sunstreaker stubbornly turned away as Optimus laid his golden optics on him, concern was clear in his optics.

Why was he worrying about him for? He was leader of Cybertron, or at least getting there, he could care less about some youngling…He wasn't even his creator, why should he care?

"I'm curious to ask why you have not been able to solve this problem." A strangely familiar voice huffed slightly exasperated. Through there was something to the familiarity that turned Sunstreaker's spark cold, causing him to tense.

"Sunny?" Sideswipe asked concerned, seeing the sudden change in his brother's demeanor.

"Is something wrong?" the mech that had come with Optimus asked confused as Sunstreaker started to whimper softly.

_Please…Please don't…Don't let it be him…_

Sunstreaker couldn't take it anymore; he had to see who this mech was he just had to.

Hesitantly Sunstreaker turned around to gaze up at the second silver mech. He had golden optics though they were more orange compared to Optimus and he was completely silver. His helmet and structure in general was sharper and more warrior-like compared to any other transformer Sunstreaker had seen before but…

_Oh Primus…No no no no no no no! It's him!_

Sunstreaker's optics widen in pure terror and realization as he gazed up at the silver ember optic mech standing just a few feet from the berth. It was him! Oh Primus! IT WAS HIM! He looked exactly how he did in his dream except he didn't have those blood red optics and this was real. He wasn't dreaming, he was looking straight a murderer.

Suddenly he couldn't take it anymore as his mouth opened to let out an energon curdling scream.

The ember optic mech jolted back in shock and surprise as well as the other bots at the door.

They all had heard Sunstreaker scream earlier but this was much MUCH worse. It sounded like someone was killing him.

"What happened?" Optimus asked surprised as he covered his audio receptors, his words hardly audible over the screams.

"Why is he screaming?" asked Wheeljack over the screams.

"I was just about to ask you the same thing!" yelled Megatron over the screams moments before Ratchet crashed through the room. His optics looked feral as his gazed quickly shifted from the screaming youngling to the closest mech to the twins.

Unfortunately that certain mech was Megatron.

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?" Ratchet roared over the screams as he quickly picked Sunstreaker before trying to get his servos on the closest wrench he had to send it in Megatron's direction, said wrench was a rather large one at that.

Lucky enough for Megatron, Arcee placed a servo on Ratchet's arm preventing him from retrieving the tool turned weapon.

"I did nothing to him! This is the first time I had even laid my optics on this youngling!" Megatron growled back in defense as Ratchet tried to calm down Sunstreaker.

"First meeting? I'd say that's a bad sign especially since you made the poor thing scream." a feminine voice commented as she walked into the room. Her voice seemed a bit off, as if she didn't particularly like speaking to the silver mech.

Sunstreaker's screams soon quieted down to soft whimpers as he peered from Ratchet's shoulder to see the owner of the voice, his curiosity had gotten the better of him.

His optics came across a copper rose femme a little taller than Arcee with a butterfly shaped helm. She had striking electric blue optics but they had a paleness to them that made her appear as if she'd seen too much making her look much older than she actually was.

The silver mech only huffed at the femme's response while Optimus gazed down at her surprised.

"Ariel, what are you doing here?" Optimus asked confused.

"I woke up after the first screams. Thought they be over but guess I was wrong." The femme now known as Ariel replied, sending a quick glare at Megatron's direction before glancing down at Sunstreaker.

Something seemed to change in Ariel's optics. Sunstreaker wasn't sure what it was but there was a change though as soon as it was there it was gone. Sunstreaker merely shrugged it off as Ratchet set him down onto the berth.

"Are you alright? What is your name, little one?" Ariel asked kindly, her voice was gentle but it also wasn't horribly sweet like she was talking to a sparkling which was good Sunstreaker assumed. Sunstreaker watched for a moment as Megatron slipped out of the med bay while Wheeljack and Perceptor left to the combining medi lab and Arcee left to some other part of the med bay. Leaving him alone in the med bay with Sideswipe, Ratchet, Optimus, and this femme called Ariel, though he really couldn't say he was alone. Sunstreaker gazed up back at Ariel, there was something about her that was familiar but he wasn't exactly sure what it was. Maybe he had seen her before? Oh well, either way he should still probably tell her his name.

"Sunstreaker…" he replied softly, not meeting her in the optics. Ariel smiled softly, nodding before shifting her gaze to his twin besides him.

"And I assume you are Sideswipe?" Ariel asked kindly, placing a servo gently on his brother's silver helm who nodded in surprise. "Hmmm it's good to finally meet you two, I myself am Ariel."

Sunstreaker blinked in surprise as she gazed at Ariel. How did she know his brother's name?

"How do you know my name?" Sideswipe asked curiously.

Ariel's expression changed slightly, as if she had caught herself saying something wrong but it didn't seemed to be noticed to anyone except Sunstreaker.

"My friend, Arcee has told me about you two." Ariel smiled lightly. "So what's going on with your brother, Sideswipe?"

Sideswipe blinked before gazing away from both his brother and Ariel sadly. "I don't know…He won't tell me…"

"Oh and why is that? He's your brother is he not? He should be able to trust you" Ariel replied, cocking her head slightly. "If he cannot tell you then it must be serious."

There was something in her voice that made Sunstreaker feel like she really wanted to help but he didn't want the help. He didn't need anyone. He didn't want anyone.

"You're not getting anything out of me!" Sunstreaker hissed as he gripped his servos on his helm, his voice cracking slightly.

"Sunstreaker, we only want to help you!" Ratchet sighed, his patients was wearing thin.

"I don't want anyone's help and I don't need you either!" Sunstreaker growled and before anyone knew it he was off the berth and shot out of the door.

"Sunny!" Sideswipe called out before running after his brother, running past the door which opened automatically. Just before the doors closed there was a faint yell from Sunstreaker to his brother saying "Don't call me that!" When the doors finally shut all was silent for who knows how long until Ratchet let out a tired groan.

"Ever since I adopted those two from the youth centers all I've tried to do is make their lives better then what it had been before…" Ratchet sighed softly as he sat down.

"I'm sure you're doing all you can old friend." Optimus sighed softly, placing a servo on the medics shoulder.

"Am I really?" Ratchet groaned softly, obviously not sure of himself as he placed a servo over his optics.

"Ratchet, what's been going on with Sunstreaker?" Ariel asked, gazing up at the medic. "Obviously he hasn't always been like this, what changed?"

Ratchet gazed down at her for a moment, moving her hand away considering it for a moment before sighing.

"Your right, Sunstreaker was not always like this…Everything changed about 10 orns after I had adopted the two" Ratchet sighed.

"It was an accident in the core…In the Spark Chamber of Primus…"

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Yay chapter 2's done! *does a little dance* Next chapter's gonna be up so ;D you get to see what happened in the "Accident" ^_^ btw for Sunstreaker his nightmares are pretty much feeling/watching life through a bot before they're gonna die. Tell me if you recognize the death I wrote in the dream FD Oh and yes Ratchet is the twins legal guardian after he adopted them before the war started :3 He sorta got attatched to them after checking on the younglings in the youth center they were in so he decided to adopt them X3

MOVING ON!

Btw this fanfic is linked to Lost Generations (you'll see WAY later on) and uh keep an eye on Ariel ;3

Please read and review!


	3. You're not alone

"The accident…" Ratchet started as he paused for a moment to collect everything that happened that day. "It all started the day I went down to the core to take some energon readings…The twins were bored I assume and decided to follow me that day."

Optimus and Ariel nodded slightly as Ratchet told them the story.

"I didn't realize they were down there until I heard Sideswipe scream." Ratchet sighed, his pale blue optics seemed to turn a bit unfocused like he was remembering what exactly happened that day.

* * *

><p><em>Flashback<em>

"_Sunstreaker! Sideswipe! Where in pit are the two of you?" Ratchet yelled as he ran throughout the various tunnels leading deeper and deeper into the core. He knew he had just heard Sideswipe scream but where were they? _

"_Primus, help me out. Where in pit are they?" Ratchet screamed to the walls of the tunnel. He was so close to the spark of Primus he figured he might have just heard him. "Sunny! Sunny!" Suddenly Sideswipe small form shot around the corner, his ice blue optics darting back and forth bewildered, startling Ratchet slightly. _

"_Sideswipe!" at the call of his name by a familiar voice Sideswipe quickly spun on his heels, turning towards his guardian. "Ratchet!" Sideswipe cried out before tackling the older medic, his frame shuddering uncontrollably in fear._

"_Oh, thank Primus." Ratchet muttered softly as he scooped the silver youngling in his arms, holding him close to his spark. The youngling in turn hugged him tightly, still shivering. Ratchet probably would have remained like that for a little longer had not something occurred to him._

"_Sideswipe! Where's your brother?" Ratchet asked, pulling the youngling away to look at him. The youngling whimpered slightly as he gazed up at his guardian. _

"_The floor, it was falling! Sunny, he pushed me out of the way and fell down somewhere with a really bright light." Sideswipe stuttered out. Ratchet optics suddenly widened in utter shock and disbelief. _

_He knew exactly where Sunstreaker had fallen into he just wasn't sure if that was a good thing. _

_And with that Ratchet started to sprint down the hall in speeds that surprised the youngling in his arms. _

_Ratchet started to run down several corridors with strange inscriptions covering the walls. Though he paid little mind to the inscriptions as he ran past them. He had studied those inscriptions before, nothing new, just the language of the Primes, their first leaders and history of their past. Though if he had taken a closer look he would have seen he had missed something of importance but at the moment it didn't matter. He needed to get to Sunstreaker, he thought as he stopped in front of a set of massive metal doors covered in the markings of their creator. Bowing his head slightly in respect before barging into the spark chamber of Cybertron._

_High above rested the spark of Primus resting dormant but that wasn't what caught Ratchet's breathe. High above was caved in metal, just as Sideswipe had mentioned, the floor had caved in and far down below was Sunstreaker._

_Ratchet quickly placed Sideswipe on the ground and the two quickly ran to Sunstreaker's side. Ratchet gasped softly as he gazed down at the small golden mech. _

"_Sunny!" Sideswipe screamed as he went to his brother's side, gasping softly at seeing him. Sunstreaker lay motionless on the ground, his optics closed shut as if he were in recharge. The only way the two knew he was still online was the gentle rise and fall of the golden mech's chest plates. _

"_Sunny! Are you alright?" Sideswipe asked as he tried to shake his brother out of whatever state he was in, earning a soft groan in response but the youngling still didn't open his optics. Ratchet could only stare at the youngling in shock. He should've died from falling from the ceiling to the floor of Primus spark chamber. He should have offlined from the force of impact but he didn't. He looked completely fine; he didn't even have a scratch on his paint._

"_Sunstreaker?" Ratchet asked softly as he placed a large servo on the golden mech's helm. "Are you alright?" The young mech suddenly opened his optics, both appearing white before fading back to their normal ice blue as he took in a deep breath as if he were holding it for eternity. _

"_Hatchet…? Sides…?" Sunstreaker gasped out softly, using the nickname he had given him the first time they had met. _

"_Sunny!" Sideswipe shrieked as he pulled his brother in in a tight embrace, small energon tears falling from his optics. Sunstreaker groaned softly in a little pain as his brother hugged him but Ratchet could tell he could also be annoyed._

_Ratchet suddenly let out a sigh in relief as he picked up the two younglings in his arms, holding the two close despite their protests._

_Ratchet simply smiled softly, holding the two to his spark before gazing up at Primus spark. "Hey Sunstreaker…" Ratchet started as the two gazed up at him. "I think someone down here likes you." Ratchet muttered softly, thanking Primus for saving his youngling._

_End of Flashback_

* * *

><p>"I didn't think much of what happened after the accident and everything seemed fine at first…" Ratchet sighed softly.<p>

"Until the nightmares started to occur." Optimus commented, gazing at his old friend intently. Ratchet nodded slightly before continuing. "At first it just used to startle him awake until the nightmares started to escalate to the point where he would be screaming himself awake…"

"And everyone else…"

"I've tried to help him but recently he's been very quiet about his dreams. All I know is that his dreams involve seeing himself die as another bot as well as this…monster."

"That's horrible for a youngling like him to suffer through." Ariel gasped softly.

"Yes…" Ratchet agreed sadly. "No one is sure what is causing these nightmares but I have a feeling it has nothing to do with Sunstreaker physically or mentally."

"Your suggesting it might be spiritually? That perhaps, something had occurred to Sunstreaker while in the spark chamber of Primus before your arrival?" Optimus asked curiously.

"Perhaps…" Ratchet sighed softly. "At first I thought Primus had given him mercy but now after all this has happened I fear he has given Sunstreaker more than he can handle..." Ratchet sighed tiredly and placed a servo over his faceplates.

"At times I feel as if Primus may have cursed him instead of granting him mercy…" he said tiredly.

"Why would Primus want to curse a youngling?" asked Ariel. "It doesn't make any sense."

"I believe that there may be more to this situation than meets the eye." said Optimus.

* * *

><p>He needed to get out of here, away from everyone.<p>

Why were they worried about him so much? It was his problem not theirs!

"Sunstreaker! Wait!" Sideswipe called out to him as they zoomed through the halls on their wheeled pedes. Primus why did they have to be twins with wheeled pedes? He was getting so tired, so tired of this pity…everything…They couldn't help him even if they spent their entire lives trying to do it. Why should they waste their existences on a lost case? An empty shell? Yes that's exactly what he was now…An empty shell…

"Sunstreaker!" Sideswipe called out again but this time through their bond. Trying hard to see his thoughts to see what was wrong. Sunstreaker won't have it, why should he give Sideswipe his problems?

Sunstreaker continued to block out his brother as well as try to get away while also feeling his brother's pain for him. He hardly even realized they were outside until about a few dozen feet from the door, the cold hitting him like ice daggers.

Suddenly Sunstreaker skidded on his pedes as he came to a stop and collapsed to his knees. He couldn't take it anymore! He was so tired so emotionally drained he hardly felt his brother wrap his silver arms around him in a comforting gesture…

Tensing to the comforting touch energon tears began to pour out uncontrollably. He couldn't keep it in anymore…He couldn't keep these emotions inside…

They were too strong and eating him alive…but…He still couldn't say anything but cry like the wrenched weakling he was. No one could help him, no one could save him, no was there to help him through the dark…No one was there…He was all alone and that's how he wanted it…

_Why can't they just leave me alone? _

* * *

><p><em>Flashback <em>

"_Hey Sunny? Do you even know where we are?" Sideswipe asked as he looked around confused, not recognizing the hallway they were in._

"_Not in the slightest, bro" Sunstreaker answered honestly as he gazed around. How could have they lost Ratchet already? They had just seen him! Maybe he didn't come up here and went the other way?_

"_Come on, let's go back. I think he went the other way" Sunstreaker said as the two started to head back down to the lower level. Suddenly a loud creak stopped them in their tracks._

"_Please tell me that was your tanks Sunny" Sideswipe said before the ground beneath his feet suddenly gave way._

"_No!" Sunstreaker wasn't sure what happened next. He thinks he pushed Sideswipe out of the way and felt himself fall but then something caught him. At that same moment he felt something hit him and he felt like he was on fire. Did he already hit the floor? No he couldn't have, something caught him._

_But why did everything hurt so much? Suddenly the pain quickly began to subside as fast as it had come and he felt like he was suspended in the air. Was he dead?_

"_**Far from it dear one…"**__ a strong but gentle voice spoke from above said softly. _

_He opened his optics but quickly shut them when they came across a very bright light._

_Why aren't I dead…? Sunstreaker asked confused as he tried to open his optics to see whoever had spoken._

"_**I am returning the favor, my Sun Warrior" **__The voice said softly as some sort of glowing vine made of energy came towards him. Sunstreaker cringed as it neared him but somehow felt no fear as the vine gently touched his forehead and his vision went white._

_End of Flashback_

* * *

><p>The next thing he knew he had woken up seeing Sideswipe and Ratchet but he didn't remember his conversation at first. He never knew who had spoken to him but he knew one thing for sure. He…he did something to him. He has something to do with all the nightmares. He has to!<p>

What did he mean he was returning the favor?

What did he do for him?

Why did the voice need to do anything for him?

Sunstreaker thought as he clung onto his brother, tears sliding down his faceplates. Was ever he did he was all alone and no one could help him…

_No one…_

"Sunstreaker! You're not alone! You have me and the others!" Sideswipe cried over his brother's quiet sobs, having sense how he felt inside from what he felt once the barriers had been let up slightly.

"I'll always be here!"

_Always here?_ Sunstreaker thought bitterly, he was smothering him, killing him with kindness and pity.

He didn't want that, from anyone, especially him.

"I…don't…want…you here!" Sunstreaker suddenly screamed in true pain and anger as he pushed his brother away. "I don't want any of you!" he screamed, gazing at him with teary optics filled with so much hatred and anger, energon tears still streaming down his optics.

"Sunstreaker?" Sideswipe whimpered softly, not understanding his brother at all. "Why won't you let us help you?"

"You see he's the thing Sideswipe! I don't want any of your help! Your pity, your sadness! I'm causing it all! It's eating me alive and you're all just wasting your lives on a lost cause!"

"But I am your brother, I am supposed to help you and feel your pain with you!"

"Brother? Feel my pain?" he laughed cruelly. "You can never understand what I'm going through even if you are my twin! You'll never understand!"

Sideswipe was silent, he could speak or even more…This was unbelievable…He couldn't believe what his brother was telling him…He always knew what he felt even if Sunstreaker tried his best to keep it to himself. He still felt what he did, he just couldn't understand it. I assume Sunstreaker hardly understood it either but now he couldn't even defend himself…He was just so speechless.

"Primus, Sideswipe if it weren't for you I won't have taken us down there to the core in the first place!" Sunstreaker yelled, bringing up the day of the accident felt like being hit by three trains for him.

"B-But?" Sideswipe started but was immediately cut off by the emotionally distressed mech.

"No! No more! This was your fault Sideswipe! You're trying to help me for what happened but in reality it was you who caused this! This is your fault!" Sunstreaker growled darkly, some sort of anger Sideswipe has never seen corrupting his brother.

Sunstreaker's clenched servos suddenly started to glow gold on the palms and strange symbols he never noticed before started to glow the color of ember against his golden armor but it looked like it was on the verge of glowing scarlet, or the color of lava.

Something was terribly wrong, so wrong his words felt like more like he was talking in a dream or perhaps a nightmare. Either way he needed to see Ratchet, he needed to comm. link him but he didn't even know how to use it much yet much less send a private comm. to Ratchet but maybe just maybe there was one option left but it didn't seem that good of an idea but it was the only way to get Ratchet.

Sideswipe inwardly gulped before gazing up at his brother.

"Sunstreaker! It's not my fault or even your fault for what happened in the core!" Sideswipe screamed though something else in the back of his processor was screaming to him that this was a very bad idea.

Sunstreaker only growled darkly in response as he took a step towards his brother, causing him in turn to take a step back.

"You know something Sideswipe? I'm sick and tired of you always trying to comfort me and make me feel better and scrap but I've had enough! I can't take it anymore!" Sunstreaker wasn't even sure if he was talking anymore. With every word he spoke it felt as if some else; something darker and more feral in his spark was speaking through him.

"I wanted to do something nice for my brother like I should to be a good older brother but what did I get in the end? Nightmares of things I can't stop or control! Fearing every time I close my optics! Having the whole entire planet worrying about me! Some pathetic youngling who had wound up in at the wrong place at the wrong time!"

"Primus! Sideswipe! I hate you! I hate you and I wish I never had a brother! I wish you never sparked!" Sunstreaker growled cruelly before his faceplates had contorted with utter shock and disbelief in what he had just said, the symbols on his armor seemed to cool down to a color of a flame but it was dying quickly.

"Sides…" Sunstreaker tried to apologize but the damage was already done as he gazed at the pain stricken expression on his silver reflection's faceplates. He didn't even realize when Ratchet and the others had arrived outside.

Ratchet was asking him something but he couldn't hear him. For those moments he felt as if he was detached from the world, and was only seeing Sideswipe's faceplates.

In words Sunstreaker could see his brother was completely and utterly shattered.

"Sides…Sides! I didn't mean it! I didn't mean it!" Sunstreaker screamed almost as if his brother was fading away and he was trying to pull him back but it was useless…Nothing he could say change what he said…He said it and that was it.

He had just wished that his brother had never existed…Now he just wished he could take it back.

"Sideswipe…I'm so sorry…" and then just like that everything went black.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I'm so cruel ain't I? Yes, yes I am. Well! Least you guys know more about what happened in the core! *uses mysterious voice* _But you don't know everything…_*evil laugh* Oh and by the way, Wheeljack had already invented comm. links by then but they are proto types and were given to specific bots though Sunny and Sides 'borrowed' some. Yeah so that's how they got some and how Sides created an open comm. link to get Ratchet's help :3

Hope you liked it! Please review!

Oh and comment if anything's unclear ;)


	4. Voices

_What happened?_ Sunstreaker thought as he tiredly opened his optics. Opening them only halfway, being the farthest he could do. Why did his optic lids feel so heavy? He fought harder to open his optics until a sudden pain burst tore through his frame.

His body turned rigid as he arched his back as pain shot into his spark and processor. Horrible thoughts and images suddenly flashed over his optics. Images of those he cared for dying all around him. His servos soaked in their energon and a twisted smile on his faceplate.

That wasn't him. That wasn't him! It couldn't be him!

Sunstreaker kept repeating that in his mind, not being able to accept the fact he had done this; even in his wildest dreams. He quickly tried to grip his helm in pain but he couldn't feel his arms. What was wrong with him? He was seeing all these things and couldn't even move!

Panic had long past through him but continued to linger as the images became worse. He wanted to scream for it to stop.

_You must fight his control, my Warrior. _

Oh how he wanted to but seeing his situation he couldn't DO anything! Much less fight whoever's control as the voice instructed him to do.

He was more focused on why this was happening. Why was he thinking of all this? All this hate and anger? Why?

Whatever the reason he wanted it to stop.

_You must fight the anger and hatred you feel within. It is His, not yours, _the voice encouraged him.

_Not mine? _Sunstreaker thought, well of course they weren't _his_ thoughts! Why could he ever think of doing such horrid things to everyone? He would never! Either way the voice saying that did gave him some peace of mind.

Either way he tried his best to do what the reassuring voice was telling him because he was definably not going to give into anyone's sick mind anytime soon.

Slowly and steadily the gruesome images began to slowly cease. His frame began to relax slightly as the pain started to recede. He no longer felt like he was being restrained and eventually all the dark thoughts retreated into a void.

At this point Sunstreaker was a bit reluctant to open his optics now. Something was nagging him in the back of his processor that it wasn't over yet.

Thought after a few moments he figured he couldn't keep his optics closed forever and opened his optics.

Suddenly he was thrown into some sort of forest, running for his life.

* * *

><p><em>Panic, anxiety, pain, anger, worry, longing, <em>that only scratched the surface of what was going through this bots mind as they ran through the forest as Sunstreaker as their wittiness. Sunstreaker knew this bot would perish but something about their demeanor suggested to him that they didn't know it.

What was going through their processor had to do with something else entirely, most likely.

Sunstreaker couldn't tell much of this bot other than they had a small built frame and very agile, maybe a femme and that _she _was injured and in pain. From what he felt she had several injures throughout her frame but most of it was coming from her chestplates, maybe her spark chamber.

Either way Sunstreaker sensed she needed to get somewhere and fast. She also probably just killed someone considering her purple armor had a light coat of wet energon dripping from it as she ran with someone else's energon.

Something kept nagging Sunstreaker that she had been protecting someone from whoever she had killed.

Now she needed to get to someone and fast, for help maybe.

Then suddenly they were at a clearing and the femme passed through some sort of boundary before calling out.

"Optimus!" He along with the femme called in sync, the voice of the femme was strangely familiar. Meanwhile down below in the clearing was Optimus himself, though he looked different, very different.

His Alt. was different and his red and blue armor was decorated in some sort of flame design that suited him quite well. Sunstreaker couldn't help but think Prime had some style.

Anyway, the femme quickly made her way to Optimus, telling him something about all the things happening were not caused by Starscream apparently. All the hardships had to do with Shockwave before suddenly, moments after Shockwave's name passed her voice capacitor a shadow passed overhead the two of them.

The femme quickly pushed Prime out of the way before the shadow came down on her. Grabbing her roughly in his grip, Sunstreaker tried as hard as the femme not to scream out as they felt the force of the mech's servo crush in her vital components.

The force was too much for her small frame he practically broke her in two and she collapsed to the ground as he let go.

"Did I interrupt something, my dear?" the mech asked and Sunstreaker knew this had to be Shockwave but Sunstreaker could hardly think about that. All he could think about was the pain.

Being crushed to death was a horrible death, especially if it wasn't instantaneously.

Every inch of his being could feel the pain that this femme felt as the mech's servos tried to crush the very life out of her. What made matters worse is that she was still fighting, fighting to stay online; praying that she _could _stay online but Sunstreaker knew it was over.

There was nothing anyone could do. The damage was too severe.

Suddenly somewhere above them they heard a savage roar of pure rage and agony causing Sunstreaker to flinch slightly.

"SHOCKWAVE!"

It was Optimus. Clearly he wasn't happy about what this Shockwave brute had done. He was beyond pissed and Sunstreaker wouldn't have wanted to be him if he made Optimus that angry.

Suddenly Sunstreaker began to struggle to stay conscious, or it was probably the femme, not him specifically. He isn't sure how much time has pass as they go back and forth between life and death but he knows that the femme was still alive considering he still felt her pain. Above them they could hear Optimus battling viciously against Shockwave. He was seriously glad he wasn't Shockwave considering what he heard from him didn't sound too good.

Somehow through the pain a weak, pained smile formed on the femme's faceplates and Sunstreaker couldn't understand why exactly.

Why would she be smiling now? It made little sense. Suddenly everything turned black and the next thing Sunstreaker knew the femme's optics opened and she was looking weakly up at Optimus.

The poor femme still wasn't dead!

Though Sunstreaker didn't focus on that too much, all he could focus on was the pain in Optimus optics. He had never seen so much pain and agony in someone just by looking into their optics. Looking at the loss in Optimus optics was too painful to see he wanted to look away but the femme refused to look away as she took his servo into hers.

This femme, she was, no, is someone Optimus truly cares for. Even an idiot would be able to see that. The way he fought for her, the way he holds her in dying moments; firmly but gently enough not to hurt her in any other way. (He actually felt very comfortable despite the pain himself).

Sunstreaker wondered who his femme was but decided against it, the answer may be too painful to bear.

Suddenly Sunstreaker sensed something; the femme was trying to tell Optimus something. Something important as an image of some sort of warehouse flashed though his optics as well as Prime's.

Then just like that the femme's servo slipped from his and Sunstreaker felt himself begin to fall…

As he descended into oblivion something still troubled Sunstreaker.

There was something that went unresolved between Prime and the femme. Something that will just have follow her to her grave he thought sadly as continued to fall., waiting to reach the bottom.

Suddenly like he was shocked awake, Sunstreaker's optics flew open as he quickly sat up right, breathing in a breath like he had been drowning.

* * *

><p>Panic coursed through Sunstreaker's frame as he clutched his chestplates, still feeling the pain until slowly began to fade and he calmed down and he realized he wasn't in the forestbattle field anymore. Once his optics finally adjusted to the lighting and he realized he was in the med bay.

_Again…_He thought bitterly. Groaning softly Sunstreaker gently rubbed his helm; the dull ache still lingered. He was no longer stuck in an endless void of his mind but the med bay. He wasn't sure if that was much comfort but at least he wasn't seeing the images anymore. The room was completely dark save for a small sliver of light coming from the door leading into Ratchet's office where he could faintly hear him talking to someone.

Not bothering to listen in on what they were saying along with a lack of interest, Sunstreaker continued to look around the med bay from where he sat. It had become some sort of habit of him waking up in the med bay.

Gazing around, Sunstreaker tried to remember what happened that got him in the med bay. Surprisingly he couldn't remember. Not a single thing.

It was all a blur. He couldn't remember a thing other than those images.

A soft shudder escaped from his voice capacitor before his optics lingered over a sleeping form on a berth across from him.

_Sideswipe…_ Sunstreaker thought not surprised. He would always wake up to Sideswipe either awake or asleep whenever he was in the med bay. For a moment Sunstreaker kept his optics on his brother's sleeping form; watching the slight rise and fall of his chestplates as he breathed softly in his sleep. All a while, trying to push away the images of his brother's energon on his own hands he had seen.

Another shudder coursed through him before his audios caught something Ratchet was saying to whoever he was talking to.

"I have no idea what I'm going to do with him anymore, Optimus."

_Optimus?_ Sunstreaker wondered. Why would Optimus care what's wrong with him? Then again he has been friends with Ratchet for a long time and he was Ratchet's problem.

"Have faith, old friend. There is a chance you will find a way how to fix this." Optimus tried to reassure him, sounding truly sincere. Though for some reason it wanted to make Sunstreaker roll his optics but he continued to listen in utter silence to avoid detection.

Considering they were talking in hushed tones they didn't plan on having him hear this.

"That's just the thing, Optimus! I don't even know what's causing this to him or if it can even _be_ repaired! I've done everything I can but nothing's worked!"

_Not enough apparently…_Sunstreaker thought bitterly seeing there was still something wrong with him. Maybe what he had couldn't _be_ repaired. Hating having to hear them pity him Sunstreaker swung his legs over the side of the berth and slid off. A soft thump echoed quietly in the room, gone unnoticed by Sideswipe as he remained asleep. Silently he made his way towards the door.

For as long as he remembered Sunstreaker has had others pity him for the pain he's had to suffer and he hated it with all his spark. They've all been saying they want to help him but all everyone's ever done was pity him.

What can pity do to help him?

Personally he figured it was best to walk away from it and ignore it at every turn and with that in mind he reached the door. Though as he placed his servos on the door controls he hesitated, turning back to gaze back at Sideswipe's sleeping form.

Something still troubled Sunstreaker so. He could not remember anything out of the ordinary happening before he went to bed. Something still seemed to nag from in the back of his of otherwise. Sighing softly Sunstreaker decided not to ponder in it too much.

It may have been nothing, so with that in mind he quietly slipped out of the med bay.

Sunstreaker made little sound as he walked besides the almost inaudible echoes of his footsteps as he walked through the empty metal halls of the base. Of course he could use his wheeled pedes to roll more smoothly but he really didn't feel like putting in the effort to transforming his pedes into their ordinary wheels.

Moving on, Sunstreaker wasn't sure where he was headed. He just continued to head forward. At least it was something.

He couldn't be around anyone who would just pity him and he couldn't go back to sleep. Better to take a walk to nowhere then the lateral.

The night was cool when he walked out as it has always been since the sun had been brought to their planet. In a sense it gave them a sort of climate which meant now and then the temperature would rise and fall with the planet's cycles.

Not that any of that really meant much to Sunstreaker. He was just glad it wasn't too cool out even to affect him. Gazing up at the stars above Sunstreaker gradually made his way farther from base to get out of the light to get a better look of the stars.

Throughout most of Cybertron was a grid like structure surrounding it like a cage except for a few parts of the planet. Simfur fell into the category of those exceptions which suited Sunstreaker just fine.

Seeing the stars from the ground level wasn't the best place to star gaze, you could see more if you climbed the grid but this was the best Sunstreaker could do at the moment. He really didn't have the energy or the desire to climb up and over the Grid just to see stars right now when he could see them well enough.

What he really wanted to do was go up there.

To see what was beyond this metal planet and see what's really outside of their little world.

Unfortunately the only way off the planet was a ship and no one's gone off plant in vorns. Sunstreaker had to wonder why. Was the call of Cybertron really that strong enough to keep an entire race from going out and exploring what's out there?

It's kind of unfair really and at the first change he gets he'll leave.

But the of course, he was just a youngling. He's going to have to wait a while even if it's just getting a pilot's license. That's where he'll have to start, that along with getting a ship but that's a different story.

He just wants to know what's out there. He was curious as most younglings are but this dream was real, not something he was just going to throw aside when he's older.

He'll do it, one way or another.

Someday…One day…

For a moment Sunstreaker felt as peace just gazing up at the stars, but then again like always his peace was shattered by a sound behind him and voice speaking from the darkness.

"Now what's a youngling like you doing out here on your own?" a voice spoke out in the darkness, causing Sunstreaker to nearly just out of his protoform as he jolted up and his optics met with two golden orbs. Sunstreaker recognized the mech immediately as Lord High Protector, Megatron and also Optimus's older twin brother.

After realizing he was most likely not in danger it took a moment for Sunstreaker to take in what Megatron had said.

"I can take care of myself!" he growled a little too bitterly, his optics shining with hatred and he hardly knew the mech. He didn't care either way; Megatron probably thought he was just some sort of weakly.

Then to his surprise Megatron started to laugh which confused him but also got him a little mad and annoyed.

"I admire that about you youngling." Megatron smirked, only confusing Sunstreaker further. Megatron simply began to laugh more, most likely due to his confusion which only got Sunstreaker frustrated.

"You made quite a commotion back there when you had seen me in the Med Bay" Megatron added, Sunstreaker couldn't even remember. Had he seen Megatron before? Why didn't he remember, he wondered before Megatron continued, "Did I startle you?"

Sunstreaker didn't really see the point of lying to the Lord High Protector of Cybertron but something was still bothering him about him. Something he couldn't remember…

"I…can't remember really. Not re—" Sunstreaker started before stopping mid-sentenced as a voice roared at him.

'_Come here you little cretin!'_ Sunstreaker couldn't help recoiling in fear when he heard the harsh voice growl at him and he almost couldn't believe who it was. It was Megatron…but why did he say that to him? Sunstreaker thought as he hesitantly glanced up at the Lord High Protector and was surprised to see he looked as confused as he did.

As if he didn't even say that to him…or maybe he really didn't…

_Maybe I just imagined it…_Sunstreaker thought before Megatron spoke up.

"Are you alright? How are you feeling?" Megatron asked a little awkwardly, confirming he had seen his recoil but decided not to go into it. When Sunstreaker didn't answer he moved on. "You nearly woke up the entire city with your screams." Megatron added, seeming to change the subject completely which was almost a relief to Sunstreaker. Megatron's voice was surprisingly gentle for the leader the Cybertron Defense Force, Cybertron's military force.

"What? Are you going to pity me too?" Sunstreaker growled, recovering from his fear from before, his voice growing bitter as he clenched his servos tightly.

"Now why on Cybertron would I do that?" Megatron asked almost curiously, completely letting go of what had just occurred. Sunstreaker knew he was still keeping it in mind.

The sincerity in his voice almost surprised Sunstreaker…but then again _almost_.

"Everyone, they've pitied me ever since the accident. Why should you be any different?" Sunstreaker demanded, his anger rising.

"Who said I was like anyone else?" asked Megatron, taking him off guard but Sunstreaker refused to show it.

"Then who are you like?" he asked, raising an optic ridge.

"You could say I'm one of a kind and I sense you are as well, youngling." This mech never ceased to amaze him, thought Sunstreaker as he watched the mech warily before getting mad again.

"Don't call me that! My name is Sunstreaker, not youngling!" he hated it whenever some body didn't call him by his name. It irritated him almost as much as the nightmares but not quite as painful of course.

"Feisty one, aren't you?" Megatron chuckled, before gazing up at the stars. "You remind me of myself. Always a little more hot headed than our brothers." He added with a smile as he watched him with his odd gold red optics that weren't sure whether they were gold or red.

Sunstreaker growled softly but Megatron didn't seem to notice as he returned his gaze up to the stars.

He was nothing like Megatron, he thought with a fiery passion he didn't understand.

What was he to compare them now?

But strange enough, this was the longest conversation Sunstreaker has had with anyone in a long time. It annoyed him and he felt as if it was just getting started but what was even stranger was that part of him didn't seem to mind…

"What are you doing out here?" Megatron asked almost out of the blue, not once taking his optics from the stars as if he himself was wondering what was out there. Just like him…

"None of your—!" Sunstreaker started before sighing softly and following Megatron's gaze to the stars. If he keeps getting mad Megatron will keep pulling him into this conversation he didn't want to have and he'll never leave him alone. Maybe being honest will make him go away?

"...I couldn't sleep…" Sunstreaker replied softly as he sat down again. "…I felt trapped…" he suddenly added, hugging his legs up to his chest, his optics never leaving the stars. He wasn't sure why he said that and regretted immediately when Megatron decided to respond.

"I understand. No one enjoys the feeling of imprisonment. I assume you've been feeling that since the accident."

_And he went there…_

Sunstreaker didn't say anything to this and lowered his gaze from the stars to the closest grid structure he could see at the horizon. It made him feel more and more like he was actually in a cage within Cybertron, within its hold.

He couldn't take saying anything else because he knew the conversation would just continue on until Megatron knew all he wanted from him. He wasn't going to let him drive out the truth from him, not now, not ever. Then again Megatron wasn't exactly the bot he thought he was. Despite the weird vibe he was getting from him, that he couldn't trust him and the conversation they were having he didn't mind really. Something was stopping him from_ not_ being able to trust him or not feel slightly comfortable around him.

He didn't pity him…or judge him like everyone else did.

He treated him like he wasn't a problem that couldn't be fixed.

It was strange…

It was almost…a relief…

"Sunstreaker!" someone suddenly called from behind them; Megatron saw who it was before Sunstreaker but he didn't need to turn around to know who it was. Sunstreaker jolted at the call of his name as he quickly turned around to see Ratchet running towards them.

_What is he doing here?_ Sunstreaker thought as he watched Ratchet. Then again he probably saw he wasn't in the Med Bay anymore and ran around half of the base looking for him.

"Sunstreaker! What are you doing out he—Lord Megatron?" Ratchet started before stopping in mid-sentence when he noticed the other mech, obviously surprised to see him there.

"I thought you had already headed out to Trypticon, sir."

"I'm actually heading out right now, please excuse me." Megatron replied as he began to walk off, taking one last look at Sunstreaker before transforming and rising up. Sunstreaker watched silently for a moment as Megatron flew off until his silver jet form disappeared beyond the horizon and he was alone with Ratchet.

For a moment everything was silent and neither them said anything.

Part of Sunstreaker wished it stayed that way as Ratchet finally decided to speak.

"Come inside Sunstreaker, you should get some rest. You've had a long night." Ratchet said calmly as he tried to coax him to listen to him but Sunstreaker wasn't in the mood listen anymore.

"I'm not tired." Sunstreaker replied annoyed, almost like a whiny sparkling but he didn't care. He didn't want to rest. He didn't want any of this.

"Sunstreaker, what's wrong?" Ratchet sighed softly, gazing down at the youngling, concern clear in his pale blue optics.

"I'm fine." Sunstreaker muttered softly but he knew he wasn't convincing Ratchet.

"Did you have another nightmare?" he asked but Sunstreaker refused to answer as well as look him in the optic so he tried again.

"Sunstreaker, you know we're doing everything we can to help you." Ratchet said calmly as he took a step towards Sunstreaker. On the outside Sunstreaker seemed passive but within his anger was beginning to boil.

"Really?" Well you're not doing a good enough job!" Sunstreaker yelled as his angry exploded and Ratchet took a step back. "All anyone's ever done is pity me and I hate it! What can pity do but make me look like a weakling?"

"Sunstreaker, calm down. You're not a weakly, not at all." Ratchet tried to convince him but Sunstreaker wouldn't hear it.

"Oh really? Well maybe not to you but to everyone else I'm some sort of pathetic weakling you got stuck with and have no idea how to deal with!" Sunstreaker growled and the angry was returning.

"Sunstreaker, they think of you like that. They are just worried about you. A youngling like you shouldn't be dealing with something like this. We want to help you." Ratchet explained calmly as tried to place a servo on Sunstreaker's shoulder but Sunstreaker quickly jerked away.

"I don't want any of your help! I can deal with this on my own! This is my problem not yours!" Sunstreaker screamed, not being able to take any of this anymore.

"Sunstreaker, I am your caretaker and you being in danger does make it my problem" Ratchet sighed softly, Sunstreaker had to give him points for being patient but he didn't care.

"Danger? What danger? You don't even know what this is and you're taking responsibility for me for this!" Sunstreaker retorted.

"I'm taking responsibility because I'm supposed to, Sunstreaker" Ratchet said, still refusing to lose his patients with Sunstreaker or give up on him.

"You're not my father, Ratchet!" Sunstreaker yelled in frustration.

"Yes, I know I'm not your father, Sunstreaker but—" Ratchet started before being cut off by the younger mech.

"Then stop pretending to be!" Sunstreaker yelled, not even realizing the impact of his words until he saw the look in Ratchet's optics. A hurt that tried to remain hidden. A coolness that refused to take over. A stab in the spark that was all but certain.

And there was the silence again only this time Sunstreaker wasn't planning to stay and he quickly began to turn away.

"Just leave me alone. I can handle this myself." He muttered softly, not once looking back in those pale blue optics before he broke into a run.

He just kept running like he's always done, he hadn't even realized he had reached his room until the door closed behind him and he collapsed to the ground. Sunstreaker remained sitting there, unsure what had caused his sudden anger at Ratchet but all he knew was that ever word was true.

For a while he just sat there curled up by the door with his faceplates buried in his arms went he suddenly felt a suddenly isolation and abandonment he couldn't explain.

Gazing up from where he sat and gazing around Sunstreaker finally realized what must have been wrong. Sideswipe wasn't there and the room seemed so much larger and emptier when you were alone…

He kept saying he didn't want others help and that he wanted to be alone but when it really came down to it…

Did he really want to be alone?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Made this chapter a little longer to make up for taking forever to update ^_^ Ah, Sunstreaker's problem makes him so bipolar at times XD Don't worry, he'll be able to work through that little problem a little later after he fixes his family issues with his brother and adopted father ;) Oh and by the way, I don't remember if I really made this clear or not but the city this is in is Simfur, somewhere on Cybertron, the place the Allspark was kept and studied before the war, says the comics ;3 It was in Simfur before later being moved to Tyger Pax in the war.

I'll try to update soon! Please Read and Review! ^_^


	5. Family Matters

Something was seriously wrong with him. Sunny thought as he made his way down the dim hallway. He wasn't referring to himself with his nightmares; they almost seemed to be somewhat of a normal thing now.

Almost.

It had been a few weeks since the incident with waking up practically the entire Science Division in Simfur, that along with his talk with Megatron; the dreams hadn't stopped being horrific but at least he finally managed to stop screaming in his sleep and waking up in the middle of the night.

It wasn't bearable; the dreams still paralyzed him with fear of all those deaths but considering how long he's dealt with it, it was beginning to feel more normal now. Sunstreaker just wasn't sure if that was a good thing.

Though, that wasn't the problem.

Sure Sunstreaker has many problems, like his continuous nightmares. Also he and Ratchet rarely spoke, but it wasn't even Ratchet who's the problem…Well not necessarily, they've been having some problems since the fight, but he wasn't who he was referring to.

He may have many problems on his servos at the moment but this one topped them all right now.

_Sideswipe_.

His brother had barely spoken a word to him since the incident. Even when he did manage to get a word out of him, Sideswipe would always avoid his optics…not that Sunstreaker cared. Why should he? His brother's been acting this way for weeks. He was probably going through a phase. This should be normal now, Sunstreaker thought.

Then why was his behavior so…unsettling?

He pushed the thought out of his processor. Vorns of pushing his brother a way and yet when Sideswipe finally keeps his distance, he still finds a way to irk him. Sunstreaker growled under his breath.

_This is all his fault._ Sunstreaker thought bitterly though he immediately felt guilty after thinking that.

Why did he feel guilty?

Why should he be feeling guilty?

He had finally resolved that he did want to be alone, to not let anyone interfere with what was happening to him. No one would understand so he'd rather be alone to face it and he's kept to that…

Something was just getting in the way of that unfortunately.

Sideswipe of course.

He just couldn't get his processor off him. He didn't even know why he was acting this way. He just couldn't understand why.

His processor kept going back to that night. Thinking that maybe Sideswipe's behavior had to do something with him, something he couldn't remember…

Why was he even still thinking of Sideswipe to begin with?

Stopping in the middle of the dim hall Sunstreaker just couldn't understand it. He said he wanted to be alone but he couldn't stop thinking back to Sideswipe. An unfortunate side effect of being a twin, you knew exactly how the other was feeling and Sunstreaker felt that something was definitely up.

What the frag was wrong with Sides? He thought as he continued to make his way down the hall.

Part of him wanted to confront him and ask what was wrong; the other wouldn't care less so he was at a crossroad.

Why couldn't he make up his mind?

Since the accident in the core it felt he was always caught with making decisions. He knew that others knew that too so maybe that's why bots kept thinking he couldn't take care of himself. He hated that, he didn't want to depend on anyone like that. If he did he'd rather be alone.

Though, when he thought about it it's hard to stay alone when you're a twin.

When you're a twin you're never alone because as long as you are both are alive you still have one another...At least spiritually. That is until the bond is severed.

Now if that were to happen the surviving twin would most likely go offline following their twin or the less desirable, surviving and living the rest of their lives with the hollowness and emptiness of their missing half.

Pretty much that meant when it came down to him wanting to be alone or not he didn't have a choice in it.

Speaking of their twin bond Sunstreaker specifically felt something was wrong with Sideswipe it was hurting him as well. He just didn't know what it was and it wasn't like he could just ignore it.

So now Sunstreaker was caught in another crossroad.

Confront his brother or ignore him and continue to deal with that unsettledness between him and Sideswipe on top of his own problems.

Sunstreaker wasn't thrilled about either option but he had to make a decision…

_Seems like my life's always filled with them, _Sunstreaker thought, _joy, _He added sarcastically.

* * *

><p>Simfur, for the average Autobot, it was a considerably sized city (considering it housed a group of Autobots, along with the Allspark), but unfortunately to a youngling, the place was enormous. Sunstreaker growled under his breath as he passed the doors that lead to the Allspark for the fifth time that joor. How difficult was it finding a mech you practically shared sparks with? No matter how large Simfur was, it gave Sunstreaker no excuse.<p>

Either Sideswipe had 'borrowed' one of Wheeljack's experimental cloaking devices (which he was really beginning to believe was the case, except they had all blown up in Wheeljack's test runs) _or_ Sideswipe wasn't even on base.

Sunstreaker highly doubted both theories. He knew Sideswipe was on base, he was just doing a damn good job of avoiding him. He stared at the doors that lead into the room where the Allspark was held, which was guarded to two bots. Whenever he had wandered aimlessly through Simfur, he would always seem to wind up back here.

Sunstreaker growled loudly and considered punching the door, but decided against it and kept walking.

As he walked, Sunstreaker figured he looked practically everywhere in the entire base for the silver mech. Where on Cybertron was he?

Sighing softly, Sunstreaker was tired of wandering around all day and made his way to Ratchet's apartment where the three of them lived. Sideswipe had to come back home eventually, Sunstreaker figured as he opened the door to the apartment. He had barely taken a step inside before stopping cold and seeing Sideswipe with a couple of data pads sprawled all over the floor in their living room.

"I wandered all of Simfur looking for you and you were hiding in _here?_"

Sideswipe said nothing; he didn't even look up from what he was doing.

"If you were looking for me, you probably should have started here; I haven't left this apartment all day." Sideswipe replied as he looked at a different data pad.

Sunstreaker glared daggers at his brother, who went back to whatever he had been doing, mentally kicking himself for having thought about looking here first but (like an idiot) had decided against it. He had probably been making him go in circles all day just to mess with him.

He was tempted just to turn around and leave, but since he came here to confront his brother, he thought he might as well do it.

_Too late to turn back now…_

"We need to talk." Sunstreaker said not at all too kindly as he crossed his arms. Sunstreaker's bluish purple optics shined threateningly at Sideswipe causing him to cringe slightly almost as if he felt it. Sunstreaker didn't understand why Sideswipe cringed but a lot of bots did when he gave them that look. Sunstreaker's optics used to be a gentle light blue like Sideswipe's but after the accident they had gotten a sort of purplish hue, for what reason he had no idea. Though for some reason many bots thought the color suited him more but that's beside the point.

Walking up to his silver twin Sunstreaker looked at him up and down before asking the ultimate question.

"What's wrong?" Sunstreaker asked with the same cold tone he used before.

"Nothing." Sideswipe answered, still not looking him in the optics.

Obviously Sunstreaker knew that was a complete lie. He can practically feel it through their spark bond that something was bothering Sideswipe, the _he_ was bothering him. So it was stupid of him to lie to him. They shared the same spark for Primus sake!

"Really? Well, I don't think I ever told you this Sides' but you were never a good liar around me." Sunstreaker growled softly. "Why have you been avoiding me?" he said not forgetting to add a little bitterness that implied he'd better not lie.

"Why would you care? You don't want anyone around anyway…" Sideswipe answered, surprising Sunstreaker slightly.

Sure he's been pushing him away ever since the accident but he never thought Sideswipe would actually listen to him.

He's always been there...but…

There was something Sideswipe wasn't telling him, it didn't just have to do with the constant pushing away. Sideswipe was hurting and unfortunately it was bothering him too…

Sunstreaker didn't want anyone around but not having Sideswipe around was unsettling as having everyone around. With those two choices Sunstreaker knew exactly which one he preferred, if not he wouldn't be here to begin with.

"Sideswipe, what happened? Why are you acting this way?"

"You really don't have a clue do you?" Sideswipe sighed softly.

"No, not really, why would I have come to you if I did?" Sunstreaker responded, starting to get a little annoyed at his guessing came. For one reason or another, his response seemed to puzzle Sideswipe slightly and he finally looked him in the optic.

"Does this all have to do with what happened that night, the last night I woke up in the Med Bay?" Sunstreaker asked, trying to piece together the puzzle. What else could it be about when that's when it started?

"Did you really mean what you said…?" Sideswipe asked, gazing up at him for the first time in the optics.

"What are you talking about? I hardly spoke to you that day." Sunstreaker asked, still not getting it.

"I meant before you woke up in the med bay, you woke up a little earlier that night..." Sideswipe tried to explain but Sunstreaker just stared at him confused.

_I woke up before that? _Sunstreaker thought confused. What did he say that could make Sideswipe feel like this? If it was bothering him for this long it must have been pretty bad. Sideswipe seemed to have caught on, on his confusion so explained.

"You woke up screaming again and Ratchet and First Aid came to get us. The last test didn't work like they thought. Then while we were in the Med Bay you freaked out for some reason when you saw Megatron. Then got mad at Elita when she was trying to help you and you ran out and I followed…"

"Okaaaaaay? Well what did I say that's so bad?" Sunstreaker asked confused.

"You were sorta having a breakdown…so I was trying to stall you while I waited for Ratchet to come and you said some things…" Sideswipe said softly, the pain and hurt returning to his optics.

"What did I sa—" Sunstreaker started before it all came back to him, hitting him like a train and he visibly recoiled.

"_This was your fault Sideswipe!"_

"_I'm sick and tired of you always trying to comfort me and make me feel better and scrap but I've had enough! I can't take it anymore!" _

"_I wanted to do something nice for my brother like I should to be a good older brother but what did I get in the end? Nightmares of things I can't stop or control! Fearing every time I close my optics! Having the whole entire planet worrying about me! Some pathetic youngling who had wound up in at the wrong place at the wrong time!"_

"_Primus! Sideswipe! I hate you! I hate you and I wish I never had a brother! I wish you never sparked!" _

Sunstreaker took that blow as hard as the first time and now he completely understood everything. If he was in Sideswipe's place he would probably be acting the same way.

It made complete sense why Sideswipe kept avoiding him.

"Listen, Sideswipe. I…I don't know why I said that, I was just so mad…You have no idea what these dreams are doing to me."

"That because you don't tell me." Sideswipe said tiredly

"Trust me; you're better off not knowing…" Sunstreaker muttered, lowering his gaze before looking him in the optics again. "You're with me whenever I wake up screaming, you really want to hear about what I'm dealing with?"

"Yes."

"_Well too bad, you're not gonna."_ Sunstreaker replied through their bond to make it clear and Sideswipe sighed softly. Sunstreaker knew he wanted to help but knew it wouldn't be good for Sideswipe even if it actually made him feel better. It was his burden to bear why should he drag Sides into this?

"Point is…I didn't mean what I said…Sure I hate everyone comforting me but I didn't mean the other things. I didn't mean it when I said it was you're fault what happened—"

"But it was my fault…I suggested that we go down to the core that day…"

"I could've said no, but I didn't." Sunstreaker argued back.

"But I was the one who stepped on that loose panel and you pushed me out of the way..." Sideswipe added.

"But I could've let you fall…but I didn't so who's fault is it really? Mine, or no one's really, which ever you like best," said Sunstreaker before something came to mind. "Or maybe it was just fate, who knows? Anyways, if I could figure that out why would I blame you and wish you were never created?"

Sideswipe didn't seem fully convinced. Sunstreaker sighed softly before taking a step towards his brother.

"Look Sideswipe, no matter how much I want to be alone and how much I kept pushing you away part of me knew you'd always be there; that I'll never be completely alone. You know why?"

"No…" Sideswipe answered but Sunstreaker knew he was curious; the gloom is his blue optics that Sideswipe had before is gone and had regained their bright blue.

"Cuz we're twins you idiot." Sunstreaker explained not unkindly but more playful. "We share the same spark, remember?"

"I know that." Sideswipe answered, offering him a weak smile that seemed to put the two at ease.

"We're all we got and I'm gonna be stuck with you for a while." Sunstreaker added as a rare smile formed on his faceplates as he placed a servo on his brother's shoulder. "Sure I'm not easy and sometimes don't seem to know what I want but I know one thing for sure. If you're not around it…irritates me. I hate that."

"Is this a way to tell me you love me, big bro?" Sideswipe asked with a weak smile.

"Shut it. The point is I'd rather have you around…and I'm sorry for what I said and nothing I said that night I meant…" Sunstreaker replied before shifting his gaze from him for a moment and Sideswipe said nothing for a long time.

"Do you really mean it?" Sideswipe asked finally, breaking the silence.

"I just said all those things saying I need you and you're still not convinced. How else I'm I supposed to make myself any clearer?" Sunstreaker asked almost annoyed as he raised an optic ridge.

"You gotta prove it." Sideswipe replied, a mischievous look appearing on his faceplates causing Sunstreaker to visible cringe. What did he just get himself into?

"Something tells me if I ask I won't like the answer…"

* * *

><p>"Go on now," said Sideswipe as he nudged his brother towards the door of the Med Bay.<p>

"Why do I have to do this?" Sunstreaker whined softly.

"Cuz, I'm not the only one you screwed up with your anger management problems that night!" replied Sideswipe.

"I don't have anger management problems!" Sunstreaker growled.

"Just keep telling yourself that." Sideswipe replied and Sunstreaker rolled his optics.

"Did I really need to fall out of a tree for this?"

"Yes! It gives you an excuse for going to the Med Bay and stay there! Now go!" Sideswipe yelled before pushing Sunstreaker through the door and it closed behind him. Sunstreaker flinched, partly for the lingering ache in his knee and for the sound of the door locked into place.

"Sunstreaker?" a gentle voice asked surprised as Sunstreaker's optics gazed up at the owner of the voice. Bluish purple optics meeting pale blue ones.

"What are you doing here?" Ratchet asked confused as he gazed down at the golden youngling.

"Uh…I was climbing an iron wood tree and slipped and hurt my knee." Sunstreaker answered. _More liked pushed…_Sunstreaker thought bitterly, making a mental note to get back at Sideswipe later.

"I see. Let me take a look at that." Ratchet replied as he picked him up and set him on the medi berth to save him the trouble of walking there and getting his tools. Meanwhile Sunstreaker tried his best not to protest the fact he accepted his help.

When Ratchet returned with his tools he made a quick scan on Sunstreaker's knee before starting to work quietly on the damaged circuitry. For a while the only sound in the room came from the tools as they worked on Sunstreaker's circuits, though Sunstreaker wasn't really paying attention to that. Sideswipe asks too much of Sunstreaker just by getting him to apologize but he had to jump be pushed out of a tree just to talk to Ratchet?

He could've just walked into the Med Bay! But no, Sideswipe wanted to make him suffer.

_Devious little runt…_Sunstreaker thought before Ratchet said something but he didn't quite catch it.

"What?" Sunstreaker asked, gazing up at his caretaker. Lucky Ratchet decided to be patient today.

"You need to be more careful, Sunstreaker. Those trees grow rather high, there could've been a chance you could've fallen from a greater height and the damage may have been worse…" Ratchet warned him much like a father would; reminding Sunstreaker of the argument they had a few weeks ago.

Sunstreaker said nothing for a moment before sighing softly. "Yes, Ratchet…"

Ratchet simply stared down at him with those pale blue optics before going back to work but Sunstreaker knew that Ratchet had been expecting some sort of witty remark; not obeisance. Sunstreaker remained silent because he wasn't sure if he was getting through to him yet.

A few minutes later Ratchet seemed to have finished attending to his knee and had begun to put away his tools silently.

"You may go now, Sunstreaker." Ratchet said, translating 'if there isn't anything else you need me for, get out' not that he ever meant that unkindly. That was simply the translation for everyone.

"Uh, my leg feels a little funny. Can I stay here for a little while?" Sunstreaker asked.

"That's not a problem…" Ratchet replied, a bit surprised by the youngling's request. He would've been gone by now under normal circumstances. Sunstreaker hated Med Bays, even when he was being treated. What would he still need? He doubted it had anything to do with his knee.

Pushing that out of his mind Ratchet went to go see what work could be done.

Though not too long later, Sunstreaker spoke up again.

"Is…is there anything you need me for? Any tests or something you need to run on me or something for my nightmares?" Sunstreaker asked almost out of the blue, surprising the medic greatly.

"Uh as a matter of fact yes…There are still a few tests that I still require but that can be done at another time, Sunstreaker." Ratchet explained, still confused by the youngling's question.

"Are you busy or something? Cuz if you're not we can do the tests now." Sunstreaker replied, taking the medic by surprise once again so the youngling explained. "I know I make it difficult for you when you're trying to help me, so I want to help now." Sunstreaker added as he looked up at his caretaker with his bluish purple optics.

For a while Ratchet said nothing and Sunstreaker thought he wouldn't.

"Sideswipe, did you change your paint job to look like you're brother?" Ratchet asked, but Sunstreaker knew by the playfulness in Ratchet's voice that he was making a joke.

"Do you think Sideswipe can pull off my look?" asked Sunstreaker, crossing his arms, pretending to look offended.

"You two are twins, so it's quite possible" Ratchet added with a smile.

A rare smile formed on Sunstreaker's faceplates as he gazed up at the yellow and red mech and he let out a weak laugh.

Ratchet copied his smile and stroked the youngling's helm lightly. "Let's get started, whoever you are."

A soft groan came from the youngling but he made no other complaints as Ratchet went to retrieve some equipment to do the tests he and First Aid required. As he did so Ratchet watched Sunstreaker for a moment as he sat on the medi berth, lightly kicking his pedes back and forth, wary of his injured knee.

A small smile formed on Ratchet's faceplates.

Sunstreaker wanted to change, he really did.

He already assumed he had made amends with Sideswipe considering he had heard them bickering like any siblings outside in the hall earlier. Now Sunstreaker was set with making amends with him. This was his decision, to change.

This youngling was really something else…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Yay! I'm starting to get out of my writer's block! 8D I think I'm getting more in the mood for writing Sun Warrior so I'll probably work on this for most of my Spring Break ;p This took me I think a day to write so maybe I'll get another chapter done soon 8D Hope you like Sun Warrior and please comment to tell me what you think! :D

Well finally Sunstreaker is doing something to fix his messed up life XD First start with family ^_^

Then next chapter will be a little sorta filler chapter with introducing a couple more characters (most of them not present in the movies but still TF characters) :3 that along with a friendly sparring match with Optimus and Megatron and how Sunstreaker works on his anger management problems XD

Peace!


	6. Old friends and The Arena

Sparkling - Newborn

Youngling - Child

_Italics_ – Thoughts

_"words"_- Twins sparkbond

Breem - 8.3 Earth minutes

Joor - About 6.5 Earth hours

Orn - About 13 Earth days

Vorn - About 83 Earth years

* * *

><p>"Why did I let you drag me into this again?" Sunstreaker asked, giving his brother the look but today he seemed immune to it.<p>

"Oh, don't be such a drag!" argued Sideswipe as they walked through the lightly crowed streets of Uraya; one of Cybertron's main cities for youth centers. Ratchet was doing business in the city with the Science division; the only reason they were there was because Sideswipe begged and pleaded.

In reality Sunstreaker had Sideswipe to blame.

"We haven't seen the guys in two years! Practically since before the accident!" Sideswipe added pulling Sunstreaker from his thoughts as the youth center came into view and he groaned softly.

"Which is exactly why I don't want to go…" Sunstreaker muttered softly.

"Come on, they probably don't even know about the accident. They won't ask questions! What's there to worry about?" asked Sideswipe.

"A lot, Sides…" Sunstreaker answered before getting smacked lightly over the head by his brother and Sideswipe smirked lightly. "Ow…"

"You seriously need to get out of that little dream world of yours, Sunny." Sideswipe replied, rolling his optics at his brother before pushing him through the doors of the youth centers.

"My little _nightmare_ world and don't call me that." Sunstreaker huffed in annoyance. He hated that nickname with a fiery passion but thanks to his little brother the name stuck. The center wasn't that busy today and there was only the occasionally couple or so that were at the front desk wanting to adopt.

With the front desks busy with them, Sideswipe and Sunstreaker quietly slipped past the desk and headed to the youngling sector of the building. Not that the workers wouldn't mind, they were familiar faces there because they too had grown up there like several other younglings just like them.

_Just another generation created by the Allspark waiting around to either gets adopted by a caretaker or until their old enough to leave. _Sunstreaker thought as he continued to walk through the familiar halls of the youth centers.

He and Sideswipe only really ever knew the sparkling sector of the Youth Center but knew the youngling sector well enough to be able to get around.

"Alright, we're here so no complaining," Sideswipe said, turning to Sunstreaker as they stopped in front of the door leading to the youngling sector.

"No promises…" Sunstreaker sighed before the two entered a brightly lit room with dozens of younglings.

* * *

><p>"<em>And you wonder why they haven't been adopted yet…" <em>Sunstreaker said through his and Sideswipe's bond, unheard by the other younglings. Currently Smokescreen was wrestling his brother, Bluestreak, for an energon goodie. Supposedly the younger brother took his snack while the other obviously denied. Now it was a big mess. Meanwhile the others, Cosmos, Tracks, Mirage and Barricade, were intervening. Half were on one side while the rest were on the other.

In a word it was chaos and Sunstreaker almost felt bad for the youth center's caretakers.

"_I told you to be nice!"_ Sideswipe growled back through their bond as they watched the predicament. Both were smart enough not to interfere and hoped it would clear up soon.

"_They can't hear me." _Sunstreaker argued back, watching with mild interest as Bluestreak bit Barricade, thinking he was helping Smokescreen.

"_Your expression isn't helping!" _Sideswipe growled.

"_They aren't even looking at me," _replied Sunstreaker which got him a well-deserved whack over the head by Sideswipe…again. It's become a new habit for him apparently and once again Sunstreaker didn't react; he just glared at his brother before turning his gaze back to the other younglings.

Part of him wondered why none of the caretakers were doing anything. Maybe it this occurred often or something that they didn't even bother anymore. They're just waiting for the day were the six of them to become legal adults so they can leave the youth centers and won't ever have to look back…Too bad they still had a couple more vorns to go.

Poor caretakers…

A few more breems passed and they were still fighting and Sunstreaker was beginning to have a processor ache.

"_I can't take this anymore, it's getting old," _sighed Sunstreaker as he got up from where he sat and Sideswipe watched silently as he jumped into the fire.

He doubted no one else was going to do anything to stop it. Without a second thought Sunstreaker picked up the two brothers by the scruff bar of their necks; being taller than them he pulled them out of the brawl. For a moment it seemed like both Smokescreen and Bluestreak were about to protest but Sunstreaker quickly set them down; before either of them could kill each other Sunstreaker gave Smokescreen his untouched energon goodie and Bluestreak kept his own.

"Now play nice," Sunstreaker said as he petted their heads, knowing it would annoy them, before sitting back down beside his own brother.

The two younger siblings merely grumbled in protest before sitting down and eating their treats quietly.

The rest of the younglings seemed relief and sat down to eat their own snacks.

"Glad that's over with." Mirage sighed with his light accent. Sunstreaker wasn't sure exactly what part of Cybertron Mirage's accent came from, not that that was really important.

"Who knew the self-centered stiff here was a peace maker?" Tracks chuckled as he gazed up at the golden twin and Sunstreaker almost cracked a smile. Not because of Track's remark, more for Sideswipe's reaction to the whole ordeal.

Looking at Sideswipe from the corner of his optic, Sunstreaker knew he was more than surprised, he was in utter shocked. He just effectively broke up the brawl of younglings before any of them could decommission one another.

He was just full of surprises, wasn't he?

"So, what have you guys been up to?" asked Sunstreaker.

"Not much really, Hound got adopted a few orns ago." Mirage sighed. Sunstreaker remembered those two were as close as brothers. "His new caretakers are apparently from Iacon so there's no chance he'll come to visit anytime soon."

"Aw, well maybe when you get out of here, adopted or not, you'll be able to see him." Sideswipe tried to reassure the red youngling.

"Maybe," Mirage replied with a weak smile and Sunstreaker took a sip from his cube of energon.

Another conversation began and Sunstreaker sat there half listening. He was mostly muddling in his own thoughts. Thoughts that mattered to him; like what was wrong with him, could Ratchet fix it, could it even be fixed to begin with?

Then there was the matter of what had caused it. Sunstreaker highly doubted the almighty creator of all Cybertronians would cause him this much pain and suffering for just falling into his spark chamber. Why would he save him from the fall if he was going to make his life miserable? There had to be a cause to his problem. At first Ratchet just thought the dreams were caused by trauma due to the near death experience; then again why would it last this long?

Nothing was adding up.

There had to be a reason, a cause to Sunstreaker's nightmares.

A reason that he couldn't figure out…

"So why haven't you guys come to visit in so long?" asked Bluestreak suddenly, it was the first thing Sunstreaker caught in the conversation and he nearly lost it but tried his best to keep his cool.

Unfortunately his half empty cube of energon wasn't sparred since it laid nearly crushed in his servos. Sunstreaker didn't even notice he crushed the cube until he felt some of the energon drip onto his servos. He probably crushed it when he heard Bluestreak ask that question; apparently the cube felt his wrath before he was able to push his anger/shock back down.

Bluestreak simply stared at him curiously, his door wings twitching slightly as he stared down at the crushed energon cube. Then again, he wasn't the only one staring as well, everyone was, even Sideswipe.

The only difference was Sideswipe was trying to contain his horror, like he really thought no one would ask why they haven't been around in two vorns.

Wiping off the energon from his servos, Sunstreaker forgot how talkative and curious Bluestreak was.

"_And you thought they wouldn't ask…" _Sunstreaker almost growled through his bond to Sideswipe who was still trying to contain his horror, though he was doing a better job than Sunstreaker did earlier.

"Everything okay?" asked Cosmos after a moment and Sunstreaker snapped out of it.

"Yes, everything's fine!" he said almost too quickly, which just brought on a lot of confused looks from the group of younglings.

"Okay but where have you been? Why haven't you come to visit?" Bluestreak asked again and a dark part of Sunstreaker's mind wanted to strangle the youngling. Somehow Sideswipe was able to come to his rescue before he did something stupid.

"Sunny's caught a virus! It was pretty bad. We couldn't visit cuz Ratchet wouldn't let him leave Simfur." Sideswipe explained, trying to clear but the confusion.

"But you've been gone for two vorns, he couldn't be sick for _that_ long" said Bluestreak, still confused on the matter.

Two vorns and it already felt like a lifetime to Sunstreaker.

"Well I did say it was pretty bad and Sunny kinda got a glitch from the virus." Sideswipe explained and Sunstreaker shot him a glare but he ignored him. "Ratchet's been trying to get rid of it but Sunny's gotten better enough to come here."

It wasn't a complete lie. There was a problem with Sunstreaker, it might have well as been a glitch caused by the accident; didn't mean he had to like it.

Sunstreaker just hoped they would buy it and stop asking more questions and drop the subject. Unfortunately with his luck that wasn't so.

"Well that must have been some heck of a virus to give you a glitch like that," said Cosmos, tilting his green helm slightly in confusion. Sunstreaker was just about ready to hit something but he held it back. He was working at his anger management issues.

"You have no idea…" Sunstreaker muttered, averting his purple/blue optics from the group of younglings. Hoping that they would catch on he didn't want to talk about it anymore.

Maybe this time it would work, or maybe not.

He didn't have the best of luck.

For a moment the six other younglings didn't say anything. Sunstreaker didn't need to look at them to know that they were staring. Of course they were staring at him; he almost crushed his cube of energon when Bluestreak asked why they weren't around and he had some sort of glitch.

If they were more aware than they let on, Sunstreaker suspected they knew there was more to it. They were curious of what caused the supposed virus or why he had the glitch.

It almost felt like they thought they would catch the glitch.

Luckily Sideswipe dived in to save him…again. Another habit of his apparently…

"It's not like you can catch it or anything. Sunny's just a little…different since he caught the virus. He just needs a little help reconnecting since he's been out for a while." Sideswipe added and Sunstreaker shot him another glare before looking at the others.

"Now don't go on treating me like a handicap from now on…" Sunstreaker warned halfheartedly as he looked away. That's how most bots with glitches were seen as; handicapped, weak, helpless, unstable…you name it.

For a moment no one said anything until Smokescreen began to laugh and soon the others followed as well.

"You sure you have a glitch cuz you haven't changed a bit, Sunstreaker." chuckled Mirage.

"Why would being sick change that?" added Smokescreen as he gently patted Sunstreaker's shoulder. Meanwhile Barricade sat there silently with a faint smile on his faceplates. Sunstreaker remembered he wasn't much of talker.

For a moment Sunstreaker just stared at them, not expecting that from their old friends. Then again there was a reason why they had become friends in the first place. Suddenly a rare smile formed on Sunstreaker's faceplates and Sunstreaker could tell that the light in Sideswipe's optics brightened by that small gesture.

"You got that right…" Sunstreaker chuckled before glaring at Smokescreen. "Now stop touching me, you're scratching my paint job."

"You've definably haven't changed, Sunny. Not in my optics at least" Smokescreen chuckled, pulling away his servo, knowing fully well that that was a threat.

* * *

><p>"Alright, so which way is the arena?" Sideswipe asked once the seven other younglings had gotten far from the youth center and were wandering through the city.<p>

"I thought you knew," said Bluestreak. "You guys are the ones taking us to the fight aren't you?"

"Hey, wasn't my idea. It was Sunny's." said Sideswipe as the group turned to the golden youngling.

"This way," Sunstreaker said simply, waving them to follow him, as he began to walk through the lightly crowed streets of the city; the younglings quickly followed his lead and kept a steady pace beside him.

"So who's Megatron fighting against?" asked Smokescreen, gazing up at the golden twin.

Sunstreaker had learned Megatron would be there in the city with Optimus at the arena, sparring to promote culture and whatever else they do. Since Megatron is a famous Gladiator several Cybertronians would be at the arena. Also since Sideswipe wanted them to see their old friends again Sunstreaker thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of the youth center and take them to see Megatron spar.

"A bunch of Gladiators from Kaon but since Optimus will be there he'll probably pull him into a spar or two," said Sunstreaker, a small smirk forming on his faceplates.

"Oh Primus, that would be so awesome!" chirped Cosmos in excitement.

"It would sure be an interesting fight." added Mirage.

"It would," said Barricade, his ruby optics shining slightly in excitement despite his impassive demeanor.

"Who do you think would win?" asked Bluestreak, his door wings twitching again in anticipation.

"Leave the bets for when we get there," chuckled Sunstreaker as he turned back to look at the group.

It was strange, for the moment he actually felt…normal.

It was as if nothing was wrong in his twisted life.

It felt good and Sunstreaker hoped it would last; if it didn't he might as well savor it.

* * *

><p>The walk to the arena wasn't far, just crowed. Luckily due to their small size as younglings, compared to the older bots in the crowds it wasn't too difficult to maneuver through the streets leading to the arena. It also wasn't hard to sneak in through the crowds to get inside either despite their group of seven; they blended in well enough no one noticed.<p>

Sunstreaker hadn't relaized how excited he was for the spar until the younglings found themselves a good vantage point, ring side.

The spars didn't begin until most of the arena was full and Megatron took down every mech that came his way.

Across the arena Sunstreaker could see Optimus standing in a pen box looking out at the arena with a few of the science division members along with a few bots on Megatron's defense force. Of the entire group, almost everyone but Optimus seemed to be enjoying themselves. It made sense because Optimus only really believe in fighting if it was truely necessary. However at some point in the spar Megatron seemed to have 'forgot' that about his brother because not long later Megatron rose his weapon to challenge his brother.

"I challenge you, brother." Megatron called up to his silver twin and a chorus of bots from the audiance began to cheer on the co-leader of Cybertron to take on his challenge.

For a moment Optimus seemed to hestiate, as if the idea didn't suit him well but Sunstreaker figured he probably didn't have much choice in the matter.

"Megatron, is this really necessary?" the younger of the brothers asked.

"You aren't afraid of a little challenge, are you Optimus?" Megatron called back.

"Of course not—" Optimus tried to explain but he was quickly cut off by the older mech.

"Well then what are you waiting for brother? Get your aft down here!" ordered Megatron and know Optimus had no choice in the matter, it would seem.

"If I must," Optimus sighed softly and the crowd went ballistic as the silver mech walked down to the arena. Meanwhile, the crowd was beginning to cheer on Megatron but also a good part of the crowd was cheering for Optimus.

"Told you," said Sunstreaker to the group as he passed around the energon goodies to snack on while they watched the show, knowing full well before the show that the two would meet each other in the ring. "Let the bets begin,"

"I bet Optimus will win! Who do you bet on, Sunny?" asked Sideswipe as he looked at his golden brother.

"I bet on Megatron," Sunstreaker answered simply as he leaned against the railing of the arena, ignoring the nickname he despised with all his spark. Watching intently as Optimus appeared on his side of the arena, watching his brother warily.

"You'll enjoy this, won't you Megatron?" asked Optimus.

"You know me so well brother," Megatron chuckled before activating his sword, prefering to go old fashion on his brother, "We all know how this will end, little brother."

"Perhaps brother, we are all certain of one outcome." Optimus replied as he activated his own energon sword.

"And what is that?" asked Megatron as he circled the silver mech, a smirk curling on his lips.

"One shall stand. One shall fall." Optimus replied and for a moment Sunstreaker could've sworn his optics flashed a striking blue before returning to their normal gold and Megatron attacked. The strike was too fast, almost impossible to dodge but it seemed like Optimus expect it and with lightening reflects he quickly sided stepped out of Megatron's path and he made his first blow at his brother. Hitting his mark as the blunt of his sword collided with the side of Megatron's helm.

A hush fell over the crowd for a moment before a roar of cheers for both brothers erupted from the crowd.

A growl eminated from Megatron's throat before he lunged at his brother again and the fight was on.

As the battle raged on, no one could take their optics off the two leaders, it just wasn't possible.

The battle was intense. Every time either leader moved or strike the other had another move that followed to avoid or intercept. To Sunstreaker the whole thing almost looked like a dance. The dance of warriors and of two opposing forces.

The two brothers knew each others moves perfectly and even with the short time Optimus has spent he was holding his own remarkably well.

Optimus wasn't a professional fighter like Megatron; he was a far more gentlier bot from what Sunstreaker had seen. A fair leader, kind leader while Megatron was firm and lead with an iron fist.

These two may have been twins but they could be no one alike than armor color. Optimus and Megatron were complete opposites and it was shown as they fought.

Megatron fought wildly and with anger while Optimus, behind his mask, almost seemed calm as he waited for the next move.

Optimus may not have much experiance fighting but he did have skills he brought into battle; and with that he knew how to hold his own in a battle.

The differences between the two leaders almost reminded Sunstreaker a little bit of himself and Sideswipe.

It was strange...

Closing his optics for a moment Sunstreaker began to listen to the metallic

The sound was clear and sharp; it almost felt like some sort of lullaby. The

Opening his optics once again, Sunstreaker's purplish/blue optics focused on the two warriors.

With each clash of their blades both brothers fought determinly and with fire in their sparks. It was a truly remarkable sight, watching the two battle it out.

However, Sunstreaker spotted something; Megatron was getting cocky.

A sudden change in Optimus arose and as Megatron was about to make a blow the younger of the brother's sided stepped out of the way. What happened next anyone could've missed if they had blinked. With lightning like reflexes Optimus suddenly surged forward and grabbed Megatron's arm. Using his momentum against him the youngest of the brothers flipped his larger brother nearly over his helm onto the ground.

Before Megatron could recover from his daze and shock (not to mention the audiance) Optimus had his sword pointed to Megatron's throat in a flash and arena was dead silent.

It was over.

Optimus had won and the arena lost it, erupting in cheers for the unlikely victor. Along with that was an uproar of cries from those on Megatron's side.

A small smile formed on Optimus faceplates the moment he removed his mask as he withdrew his energon blade and offered a servo to his brother. Megatron took his servo without a word and the two faced the crowd. The crowd continuing to cheer but Sunstreaker noticed something…odd.

A change in Megatron's optics…

"Hah! Optimus won! Now hand over that axel grease!" Sideswipe laughed and Sunstreaker gave it to him without a word. There was something strange about the look in Megatron's optics as he looked at Optimus. On the exterior nothing appeared wrong but hidden beneath the placid surface was something…different. Sunstreaker couldn't explain it.

It was like something was boiling within Megatron's golden red optics. It was felt familiar to Sunstreaker but he knows he hadn't seen it before but it still felt familiar; almost feral…

It didn't even appear as if Optimus seemed to notice either. So why was Sunstreaker the only one to notice?

* * *

><p>"You look like your dancing." giggled Sideswipe.<p>

"Shut up, I'm trying to concentrate." Sunstreaker growled as he tried to focus back on the move he was going earlier before being interrupted by his brother.

Of course he wasn't dancing; he was working on some sword fighting techniques. It was supposed to help him with his anger management problem and keep him distracted. They had just gotten back from the arena a few breems after sneaking their little gang back to the youth center with no incidents. Since he wasn't tired and didn't want to recharge Sunstreaker thought it would be good to work through ways to control his anger.

Like the proper forms of sword fighting.

He was going to change one way or another; this was going to help him out.

Teaching himself to sword fight.

Sunstreaker had always been fascinated by sword fighting and sword making. He was going to go see to make himself some swords of his own. Sword making took patients; it should be a good start for him after learning these techniques without a sword.

Once he had a sword he could really begin to train…

"Sunstreaker," a voice called, drawing him back to reality. Glancing up to the call of his name, Sunstreaker's purple/blue optics came to rest Ratchet, who was standing by the doorway. Since he was only calling him that only meant one thing…

"Time to do some tests," Ratchet stated simply.

"Ha!" Sideswipe laughed and Sunstreaker shot him a glare.

"Sideswipe, you can catch up on your studies." Ratchet added with a hidden smirk and immediately Sideswipe stopped pestering his brother.

"Wait, what?" exclaimed Sideswipe.

"You heard me, go on now." Ratchet smirked as he motioned Sideswipe to go and the youngling reluctantly left the room, heading in the direction of their apartment. Ratchet watched him for a moment before gazing down at Sunstreaker. "Shall we?" asked Ratchet as he motioned Sunstreaker in the direction of the Med Bay

_Translation: Med Bay, now. _Sunstreaker thought with a sigh before walking down the hall to the Med Bay.

* * *

><p>"Ratchet, how much longer do I have to wear this?" Sunstreaker whined, complaining about the contraption on his helm with several wires extending from it. It covered his entire helm like a helmet connected by cables and wires with some sort of machine Ratchet was fiddling around with.<p>

"Just a bit longer, I'm still running the diagnostic," replied Ratchet as he read through the data on the screen that meant nothing to Sunstreaker.

Originally the medic had told him it would only take a few breems to do the tests but now it had pushed to a few joors and Sunstreaker was becoming a little tired and frustrated.

"Ratchet, I feel like a lab rat!" said Sunstreaker as he tried to pry off the helmet and the older mech just chuckled. Taking the youngling's servos off the helmet Ratchet gently took off the helmet off Sunstreaker's helm and had set it down beside him.

"You're not a lab rat, Sunstreaker." Ratchet chuckled.

"Did you not see me in that thing?" asked Sunstreaker, rolling his optics and crossing his arms.

"We're almost done here Sunstreaker," said Ratchet as he gently stroked the youngling's helm, noticing the dark circles under his optics. "You should get some recharge after this."

"Why? So I can have another nightmare? I'd rather stay awake," replied Sunstreaker.

"Perhaps that is what you want but your body needs the rest." Ratchet chuckled softly. "Besides, we need to test if we've made any improvements with the tests."

Sunstreaker merely growled softly in annoyance and turned away from the older mech. He really looked exhausted. For all Ratchet knew he had been up for vorns. Cybertronins didn't need much recharge but some was needed for proper function.

He assumed Sunstreaker was at his limits with recharge. It was obvious with the dark circle under his optics.

"Sunstreaker, you know very well this is for your own good," Ratchet replied with a sigh, petting the youngling's helm lightly just how he liked it when he was a sparkling.

"Yeah well that thing was scratching my paint." Sunstreaker complained before whining softly, annoyed by his gentle touch but immediately fell silent as Ratchet stroked just behind his audio receptor.

Ratchet chuckled softly, that always had managed to get Sunstreaker quiet down when he was a sparkling. Speaking of sparklings, it was hard for Ratchet to believe that only two vorns ago Sunstreaker was in his last stages of sparkling hood; a mere sparkling, free of worries and troubles.

Now, since the accident, Sunstreaker appeared to have aged twice his normal age. It almost pained Ratchet. Elita was right; Sunstreaker shouldn't have to be dealing any of this.

"We're almost done here, don't worry." Ratchet added before leaving Sunstreaker, turning back to the data and read through them piece by piece. Suddenly out of nowhere Ratchet began to hear a soft hum.

Glancing up he realized Sunstreaker was humming as he waited.

Ratchet did not recognize the melody right away but when he did he realized it was an old lullaby Sunstreaker used to sing to Sideswipe when they were sparklings; to comfort him.

He recalled Sideswipe explaining to him that his and Sunstreaker's creator had sung it to them before they went to sleep; it was all they could remember from their creator before she had gone offline due to a virus she had contracted not long after sparking the two.

Sighing softly Ratchet turned back to his work but not a moment later his thoughts began to wander again.

There were several ways of creating sparks. The more obvious way was the Allspark but there was an alternative which was when two cybertronians create another spark either by interfacing or spark bonding. Both ways were relatively safe but Ratchet assumed the twin's creator had gone offline because her body could not support all three sparks without taking a toll on her.

It was such a shame in fact, Sunstreaker and Sideswipe never knowing their creator or even their sire.

The day their creator had gone offline the two had been sent to the youth centers.

The only reason Ratchet knew of the two was because he had known their mother. When she had been dying their creator had gone to a small clinic where he himself was starting as a new medic. Although Ratchet wasn't assigned to her case he had still come to know her. He didn't know her well but he had always check up on her when he wasn't working; just to see how she was doing.

_She would have been a great mother…_Ratchet thought sadly as he gazed down at Sunstreaker.

Even when she was sick, their mother would always ask how the twins were. She wouldn't ask much how she was doing, her main concern was always them.

When she had gone offline Ratchet decided to keep an optic on the twins while they were in the youth centers before eventually adopting them.

It was the least he could do in her memory; to watch over her two younglings. Ratchet simply couldn't let them grow up in the youth centers and in reality he had grown rather fond of the two. Ratchet had Sunstreaker and Sideswipe with him vorns before the accident.

"How much longer, Ratchet?" Sunstreaker asked, pulling Ratchet out of his thoughts as he rubbed his optics slightly, trying to shake the sleep out of them.

"Not long, there is just one last thing to be done." Ratchet promised as he walked up to the youngling and opened his cerebral unit to look into the circuitry.

Sunstreaker gazed up at him with mild interest. At least this was better than wearing that helmet thing.

"Alright, Sunstreaker I need you to answer some questions for me in this test." Ratchet explained as Sunstreaker felt the medic's surprisingly gently servos fiddle with some sensitive wires of his cerebral unit.

"Alright, Doc." Sunstreaker replied, knowing Ratchet hated that nickname. I'll probably pay for that later, during his next check up by the medic.

"Let's get started then." Ratchet said as he tweeked something in Sunstreaker's helm. "What city are we in?"

"Simfur," Sunstreaker answered simply; it was an easy question.

"Alright, how old are you, Sunstreaker?" asked Ratchet.

For a moment Sunstreaker paused and he closed his optics. What was the question again? Oh yeah, how old was he, how could he forget? "10 vorns," he replied simply. When Ratchet didn't respond Sunstreaker opened his optics, why didn't he say anything?

"Ratch-?" Sunstreaker asked as he opened his optics and nearly jumped out of his protoform when he saw Ratchet staring at him, about two feet away from him. "Gah! Scrap, Ratchet you startled me!" said Sunstreaker, feeling a little annoyed.

Suddenly that feeling dropped when Sunstreaker saw how worried Ratchet seemed to look. Did something happen?

"Ratchet?" Sunstreaker asked, confused but he was only ignored by the older mech as he transformed his servo into some sort of light.

"This is bad…" Ratchet said gravely as he began shining the light in Sunstreaker's optics.

"What? What happened?" asked Sunstreaker confused, wincing slightly at the bright light shining in his optics. He had only answered two questions and Ratchet was already going about something being wrong. Ratchet didn't answer him and continued to ignore him as he quickly did a scan of Sunstreaker's processor and began to read the data from the scan.

"Ratchet, what happened?" Sunstreaker asked a little stronger, trying to hide the fact that he himself was beginning to freak out do to Ratchet's odd behavior.

Ratchet finally seemed to snap out of it as he gazed down at the youngling.

"Sunstreaker…" Ratchet started softly, as if not sure how to explain it. "You blacked out for almost an entire joor just now." Ratchet explained his voice was grave.

Sunstreaker just stared at him, thinking he was joking but he couldn't be more than serious. It didn't even feel like a joor! He just closed his optics for a moment to think about the question then the next second Ratchet's here telling him he was out for joor? For a moment Sunstreaker was angry, but not at Ratchet or even himself. He wasn't sure who he was mad at, he just was.

"From your scans it says that you will more than likely black out again. We'll just have to find a way to fix this hopefully before it happens again." Ratchet explained and Sunstreaker nodded without a word.

In the attempt to fix his problem they might've just caused another.

Looks like Sunstreaker's luck was as bad as he thought.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Yay long chapter for the long wait :3 Hope you guys liked it XD Oh yeah, sorry about the sucky battle T.T I wasn't in the right mood to make it epic, FORGIVE ME! DX And yay to friends! Oh and tough luck for Sunstreaker getting blackouts D: That will come to play later on in the fanfic I promise you! Anywhoo! I realize something…I making Ratchet a little OOC! D: Oh noes! Eh, I'll try to figure something out to try to bring out our old Hatchet. The reason he's so…nice is cuz Sunstreaker's condition calls for patients and what not. Him being the real Ratchet would have probably made Sunstreaker worse D: Hmmmm…Maybe Ratchet became tougher after Sunstreaker dies? *shrugs* Probably :3 Makes sense, don't you think? So yeah! You also know how Ratchet began to evil twosomes guardian XD Yeah...*looks at chapter outline* Yeah we still got a long way to go before we go through the prologue where Sunstreaker dies. I'm gonna mention a few things about his death that I didn't before, like I dunno, why he got shot to begin with! XD Yeah, that and the song/lullaby he sang to Sideswipe. That's got meaning now and a little something else XD

Great now I'm ranting…Don't mind me! Hope you like the Fanfic! XD Sorry I'm not too descriptive with places or bots, not really my style but I'll try to do that XP

Peace! Please Read and Review!


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